http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk Formula for Change is cutting edge coaching, designed to help you think your way to achieving your desired changes. en-us Copyright 2010 Helen Noble Perhaps it’s just me, but I get a sense that in general terms ‘doing’ is far more valued in the world of business than ‘being’. The thing is, ‘being’ is our natural state or default setting, whereas ‘doing’ requires a little more effort. In ‘being’ we are effortlessly using our innate and developing talents; whereas in ‘doing’ we are applying our efforts to interpret a specific set of rules in order to perform a defined task. I think perhaps the trouble starts when there is a greater disparity between how we ‘are’ and what we think we have to ‘do’, to be of value. And as any student of psychology or business who has encountered Abraham Maslow’s ‘hierarchy’ of human needs will tell you, we all need to feel valued (for how we really are)! And yet there are so many of our natural skills and abilities that have just not been valued within the traditionally business environment. For example, the use of intuition or empathy, are neither (or at least not yet!) quantifiable nor subject to exact reproduction in laboratory settings; and therefore have been designated as ‘irrational’ processes. To date, they have not been widely regarded as reliable bases for decision- making. However, some theorists and researchers have claimed that intuition is not an externally or mystically sourced ‘power’ of insight; but merely part of the human cognitive processes. It is claimed that we already have all the knowledge required to arrive at the ‘a- ha!’ moment deeply embedded in our brains. We access the solution at lightening speed by ‘thin slicing’ through our dense knowledge base in a most effective and economical manner, to arrive at the right conclusion. As such, we are often unable to retrace every step in detail. As much of our life-long learning process remains at the sub- conscious level (who can actually remember actively learning their mother tongue or taking their first step…?) then who is to say the process of recall does not work in a similar way? It may well be the case. Therefore, in my view, this strengthens the argument that this high- level functioning process of ‘knowing’ is to be valued and incorporated as part of our multi-faceted decision- making process. To demonstrate or to respond to empathy from others has also traditionally been regarded as aspect of human behaviour for which there is little requirement or respect, in the business world. However, empathy is an integral feature of any human being, (I feel, therefore I am!) albeit the capability varying greatly between people individuals… As most business or work environments necessitate communication between people, I am still amazed by the number of people in business who claim to have no interest in how we humans function! Something akin to a doctor who expresses no interest in the human body; or a mechanic who just couldn’t care less about how the components of an engine can work together most efficiently! Try re-tracing your ‘cognitive steps’ in one very important decision that you have made in your life. I’m confident that at some point the facts or the exact reasoning becomes a little less obvious. This is because our cognitive processes are awash with thoughts; feelings; attitudes and beliefs, interwoven with a mix of our current interpretation of experiences and our previously constructed memories. When making important choices or deciphering complex scenarios we are informed by the whole of our internal sensory database, as opposed to one select sphere, such as the cool rationalisation of the facts of the case. No doubt there are many of us who, having worked in many traditional, male dominated environments, have felt inhibited in openly expressing our innate abilities. For example take the intention to nurture, which many women incorporate into all of their relationships, not just familial. There is much debate about whether this is an innate or learned behaviour, however it is most important to realise that this is a skill, equally as valid as any other. Nurture is a crucial component of the social fabric of human society. In essence, it is on both individual and social levels, a positive and constructive phenomenon, so why exclude it from the workplace? Surely it can only add an extra dimension to the sense of being valued; one of the needs that we all need to function most effectively? I feel it is time for those of us who want to realize our full potential, to cut to the chase and start valuing and applying our full range of our skills and abilities -without apology! http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=0 Helen Noble Wed, 7 Jul 2010 00:00:00 GMT How do you score on the FT (Frustration Tolerance) Index? It’s been a trying time, for many of us. No flights; no information; not knowing (or thinking that we are knowing) how/when things are going to turn out as we wish … Hundreds of thousands of people have been subjected to the same or similar constraints; and yet we will all have reacted in varying ways. Some of us may have felt angry at the unwanted interruption to their plans; others disappointed that they could not do what they had planned; some will have not spent too much time thinking or dwelling on their feelings about the situation, but will have opted for instant action in an attempt to get to their destination. Our response in a given situation will depend on a number of factors – age, experience; understanding and learning, just to name but a few of the variables interplaying in any given situation. However, one collective factor that may have played a significant part in how we determined our individual responses might be our unique levels of ‘frustration tolerance’ (FT). This is, essentially, the degree to which we can, or choose to, manage levels of frustration effectively, before resorting to ‘acting out’ our feelings. You may have heard many other terms to describe this notion of regulating our own behaviour – for example being ‘centred’; ‘grounded’; ‘congruent’; ‘patient’; ‘in control’… However the essence is the same – we all react in varying degrees to the frustration we all inevitably feel when we perceive that something is not going our way. Some people may appear to go on the offensive – shouting the odds, demanding responses and action; at the other extreme some may appear to ‘give up’ and look to others to take responsibility for the situation. Both extremes are indicative of low levels of frustration tolerance (LFT) The reactions of most of us will probably fall somewhere between the two extremes depending on our instinctual responses, as tempered by our social learning experiences to date. For example someone who has found themselves in this, or a similar situation previously, will have accrued some ideas of how to deal with it most effectively. Almost all of us can learn how to deal with any given situation, if we are aware of our realistic choices; individual strengths and collective abilities when part of a crowd. However, it is nearly always the positive thoughts, feelings and ensuing actions we take that help us to make progress in problematic situations. It is the constructive thought processes and re-evaluation of instinctual negative emotions that allows us to develop high levels of frustration toleration (HFT) and so solve our problems most effectively. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=1 Helen Noble Wed, 21 Apr 2010 00:00:00 GMT So now the New Year is well and truly underway and resolutions of change have either become part of our lives or have long been abandoned. So what determines our success or failure? What is it that makes some of us keep on keeping on; and others quit? ‘Motivation kicks in after you have experienced success at something’, said Michael Neenan, author, and tutor on a CBT (Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy) -based coaching course I attended a few years ago. This was not how I had thought about motivation until that point. So motivation is a product of reward? Or is motivation a reward in itself? If so, how can we gain or enhance our level of motivation? *Daniel Pink claims to have greater insight into the nature of motivation or ‘drive’ and reveals his ‘surprising truth about what motivates us’. He distinguishes between an ‘extrinsic’ reward (eg carrot or stick outcome dependent on our actions); and ‘intrinsic’ reward – where the inherent satisfaction from carrying out a task is reward in itself. Pink believes that the old punishment or reward outcome can work in the short term, for example, I could write this blog because someone has offered me money to do so. However, if I wrote blogs purely for financial reasons then long term, my motivation to do so would diminish. I would be approaching the ‘task’ from the point of view of a finite project with a defined outcome. Even if the financial reward was substantial and guaranteed, the reward in itself would diminish in time – I would get used to that level of income and there would at some point be a desire for more money or another type of extrinsic reward such as fame or recognition of some sort. However, if I am writing for the intrinsic reward, then my motivation to do so will become stronger. Pink believes that an intrinsic reward is something that enhances our sense of autonomy, mastery and sense of purpose. Essentially if we are engaged with an activity that we are able to do well, we will enjoy it and become even better at it. I write blogs to explore and share things that I find interesting and may be helpful to others. Pink uses the legal profession for a perfect example of this. Although individuals may enter the profession for altruistic purposes, to ensure justice, or fairness; if they are employed in private practice they will eventually become a slave to what he refers to as the ‘billable hour’. Thus, reduced to meeting fee targets, their motivation becomes firmly focussed on the end product of profit- costs . Their behaviour becomes governed by the ‘means to an end’ type of rationale; and the personal sense of mission disappears. Their sense of self –efficacy becomes dependent solely on their ability to make money and therefore their sense of autonomy ( which includes the need to feel in control of their destiny, as in fulfilling their altruistic ideal) becomes sadly depleted. If they reach the target they are momentarily validated – however there will always be the next target! Of course this is not true of all lawyers in every aspect of legal practice; and is also quite true of many other professions and occupations, such as sales targets for property and estate agents. Take the example of a would- be- novelist. If the motivation to write a best- seller was purely financial; not many books would actually get written. Imagine having to work at a project, sometimes for years, before someone else appreciates its value and pays you for it. Chances are the writer would have died of starvation or packed it in for a job to pay the bills. So what keeps an unpublished writer writing? Answer: their intrinsic motivation. They are doing it for something other or certainly more than just a financial gain. Whilst writing they are experiencing a sense of autonomy – they are researching/writing something of interest ; in the circumstances they find most conducive to creativity. They are in control of what they do and how and when they do it. This is the essence of autonomy. The completion of such a self-directed project then results in a sense of mastery, the feeling that they have attained a high level of the skills needed for that project. Then there is the element of purpose. Everything we do in life is for a purpose, even if it is purely for the enjoyment factor, then that in itself is a purpose. Financial reward is just one in a whole range of rewards we glean by way of outcomes from our actions. Thus intrinsic motivation is more diverse, far reaching and greatly enduring in nature than extrinsic motivation can ever be. So if your journey is a long one – make sure you know how to generate the drive to see you through! * Daniel Pink - ’Drive: the surprising truth about what motivates us’, 2010. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=2 Helen Noble Sun, 21 Feb 2010 00:00:00 GMT Victim or Victor? There are genuine victims in life. For example, people who have been on the receiving end of the unscrupulous or criminal behaviour of another person. Then there are natural disasters such as famines; plagues and floods to which people fall victim – although whether the actions of humans have any real impact on these sorts of events is debateable… Then there are victims of mass man- made actions such as wars, including the brave soldiers who lose their lives in the name of duty. Then there are those people who suffer as a result of a voluntary undertaking – they become a victim of their own scheming. However instances of victim-hood are usually one off events; and just because you have been the victim in a single experience doesn’t necessarily cast you in the role of victim for the rest of your life. Unless, of course, you want it to. Victim -hood is essentially a state of mind –the default setting, or habitual thinking of a person who interprets all or many of life’s situations through a negative, disempowering lens. In some instances this way of thinking is so ingrained that people cannot contemplate thinking or feeling in any other way. However, there is an antidote! It calls for a radical new way of thinking – a positive, self-empowering mode in which you accept responsibility for all the occurrences in your life – despite their origins. We can’t always choose what happens to us – the consequences of the actions of others -yet we can always choose how we respond to the situation. And the cop out is to blame someone else. And to never move on from that point. The first step in taking control of your own situation is to accept the here and now – exactly as it is. This doesn’t mean you have to like it. – just to objectively see it as it is. Then it’s important to identify what exactly it is that you can realistically do to change things. Once you shift your thoughts away from blaming other people and concentrate your efforts on doing something to improve things for yourself, you lose the victim-hood and don the cloak of empowerment. After all , the only person in life you are ever going to assume full control over is yourself! So when you’re feeling a little sorry for yourself (we’ve all had those days!) take the power into your own hands and do something positive to make things better for yourself. Choose to see yourself as succeeding. Be the victor, no longer the victim. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=3 Helen Noble Sun, 13 Dec 2009 00:00:00 GMT I had the great opportunity recently to take a peek behind the scenes at a local radio station; and to try my hand, or perhaps I should say my voice, at recording. For me this was, in effect, a reversal of skills. The most recent voice training I received was in relation to the delivery of hypnotherapy, which required the use of a relaxing, gently suggestive, lull. Whereas radio is about upbeat, larger- than- life voices conveying all the things that body language can’t through the medium of radio. I found myself having to concentrate on the pronunciation, tone and emphasis of my words but with a view to demonstrating a higher level of energy and enthusiasm – the stuff that makes people sit up and listen! The use of back-round music can suggest a context; and special effects and enhancements can change the nature of a voice, however the main thrust of communication in talking radio is through the use of words. With non-verbal communications, including gestures, facial expressions, body posture, tone of voice, conveying 93 % of meaning, this means that just 7% of human communication is due to the power of words. The behaviour of dogs can provide a good illustration of the power of body language in action. For example, try directing your dog with a complex set of verbal instructions, delivered in a relaxed and polite manner -you’ll soon give up on that and revert to issuing basic commands and pointing to get your dog to do what you want! Dogs tune into the tone of voice and body stance, in essence they sense the ‘energy’ of the communication – they assess the (lack of) urgency of the communication and act accordingly. If I just calmly ask ‘who’s there?’ my lazy Labrador will barely stir; however if I raise my voice and make the phrase sound more urgent, his head will jerk suddenly upwards, his floppy ears go ‘on alert’ mode, and if I move, he will run towards the door, barking a warning. And despite having the facility of language, humans also use this non-verbal communication system for many of their interactions. If we pretend we are not emotionally affected by something; or we make a statement that we know isn’t true, our body will in some way convey the true message, thereby contradicting our words. We look for these sorts of verbal cues in others when we are trying to determine whether or not someone is telling us the truth. So this got me to thinking as to the great power potential of words; and how focussing on the words alone can only make them more powerful, whether in a negative manner or in a positive, constructive way. I spend most of my working life reading and listening to words; and writing and speaking words in return by way of letters, faxes, email, by telephone and face –to- face meetings. The accuracy and clarity of meaning conveyed by these words are largely my main concerns. The content of letters and emails is so easily misconstrued as there often is no ‘context’. As such, the reader will assume (and often wrongly so!) the emotion and/ or intention behind the message. We have all read or heard words spoken by others that have become embedded in our memories. Whether we perceived words spoken by others to be of a positive or negative nature, is the result of the interpretative slant we choose to place on the words. So to make your words more potent and your verbal communications more effective I would suggest carefully evaluating the words you choose; focusing on the intention of the communication in hand; and assessing the overall success or failure of your communication. This way you can implement changes if you need to improve your success rate And when it comes down to receiving a message, always look for additional non-verbal cues, which will help you assess the communication more accurately. If you have only words, assume nothing and if necessary, ask for clarification! http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=4 Helen Noble Thu, 3 Dec 2009 00:00:00 GMT “This computer just doesn’t understand me!’ exclaimed the youngest daughter sometime very early, this dark Monday morning. “ I googled (new world verb) ‘Chihuahua images’ but it didn’t give me what I wanted.” (and yes she had spelled it correctly!) Still half asleep I asked her what exactly it was that she was after. “Cartoon drawings to colour in” Of course! ‘I’ll change the filter, the internet settings…later’ mumbled her dad, also just as rudely roused from the depths of sleep. A little later, on checking email I received a jubilant message from the eldest daughter, who, having successfully completed a university assignment on the subject of personal psychological and social influences on human behaviour, was hoping I could cast a critical eye before she submitted an electronic copy…at 2:30 this morning! Having subjected her work to the on-line ‘anti-plagiarism’ filter facility, she was feeling confident that she had written a good paper, but was looking for that second opinion! These two instances got me to thinking how we all have a ‘filter’ of sorts; and how this often contributes to misunderstanding, confusion and frustration in communications. Just as software filters can determine what information the individual may access; setting the boundaries for knowledge so to speak, so our personality filters the information we receive from the world about ourselves, others and situations. Our attitudes, beliefs and life experiences to date, largely determine our understanding of, and response to, all situations that we encounter. Our memories act as some sort of measure or yardstick of understanding; and our feelings and thoughts largely determine our chosen behaviour in response to a given scenario. And this filter is subject to numerous updates. The greater and wider our life experience, then the more expansive our inner database, from which we can access information to make a decision or exercise a choice. The word ‘filter’ suggests that there will always be some superfluous-ness in life and indeed some psychological theories choose to see the functioning of the brain as a self- organising system based on principles of economy, meaning essentially that we select and retain information on a ‘need- to- know basis’. Just like any search engine, when we wish to retrieve a specific piece of information we use a filter like process to retrieve the required fact, name or number from our complex memory system. And all before breakfast! http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=5 Helen Noble Mon, 9 Nov 2009 00:00:00 GMT Last night as I lay quietly in bed, a whole load of noise and action was playing out in my head. At one point it got so loud I wondered if it would wake up the dogs and set them off barking. However, it didn’t and eventually all the palaver settled down and one of my last thoughts, just before I dropped off to sleep was that the saying ‘we come into this world alone; therefore it is natural for us to leave it alone’ isn’t quite true. For example, when we are born there is always at least one other person present, our mother! And, when we die, it is often in the company of others, such as nurses and doctors. Although I was fortunate enough to spend her last evening with my aunty, I wasn’t by her side when she stopped breathing and slipped away in the early hours of the morning. However, I know that there were some gentle, caring people to hand. Those hands would have carefully closed her beautiful blue eyes and removed all the intruding needles from her fragile skin. The same hands would have silently cleaned and gently wrapped her childlike body, for the last time, before lifting her from her bed. As in death, so during birth there are the hands of the midwifes and doctors, to ease the delivery and ensure the safety and survival of the new arrival. These hands also work unseen and are soon forgotten, once the task has been completed. However, they are, nevertheless always there when needed. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=6 Helen Noble Mon, 28 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT Yesterday I played the odd -one -out game. I sat in a room with three other ladies; and I was only one with hair. They were all drifting through varying states of sleep and I gently woke my beloved aunty with a tiny squeeze to her fragile hand. Her hands have always been important to her - I guess she felt it was important to have nice hands with which to serve people with food and drink. I was visiting her on a bright Sunday morning and had brought with me a supply of her favourite hand cream, the one whose scent transported me momentarily back to childhood. The room was light, and the atmosphere warm and caring, nothing like the hospice of my imagination. As the visit progressed I realised that one of the ladies was fully aware of where and how she was, as she subjected her husband to questions as to what he had and hadn't done around the house in her absence! The other lady, bless her, was conscious only of her pain; and my aunt was experiencing moments of lucidity. We talked about the flowers surrounding her bed; and how sunny and warm it looked in the pretty garden we could see through the window. We talked about her sons and totalled up the number of great grandchildren she now has by recalling the photographs she has on the mantelpiece in her lounge, at home. Then we started talking about the times we had shared; when, as she explained it, her life 'all came together'. My aunty started to play a more significant role in my life when she married and started to run her own pub/restaurant . I was around in school holidays to help out around the place and learn from her. When I asked her how old she was at that time, I learned that she was the age I now am...and it was then that I experienced my first lucid moment of the day. The level of my consciousness was raised by the realisation that time does march on to its own beat; and the only way to utilise your time is to regard it as the precious commodity it really is. If we all constantly remained at this state of consciousness I'm sure the only crime ever committed would be that of slipping into a state of complacency. I awoke early this Monday morning with that thought firmly in my mind and roused my sleeping children, all in varying states of dishevelled grumpiness, with a kiss and a smile. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=7 Helen Noble Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT Take two flagging forty-somethings; a pair of sprightly seventy-year-olds; add a silent teen(r)ager and one busy, bubbly seven year old… place them all in close proximity with no TV for a week, and what do you get? Hellish summer holiday, or Heavenly respite? Well, how about something between the two… Six of us went sailing on the river Shannon in the heart of Ireland; and (the same!) six safely returned home to Pembrokeshire , wind blown and refreshed – despite the additional six hour wait for the ferry, due to cancellation of the catamaran courtesy of high winds (in August!!) It’s funny how life sort of changes around you, without you noticing every detail. It’s as if one day you realise that you’re no longer playing the part of child; young adult; newlywed or shocked parent. In fact you are now practising a precarious balancing act of simultaneous child and parent, whilst also having to assume responsibility for the younger and older members of the party. Perhaps that’s why it’s termed ‘middle age’ – not because you’ve necessarily reached the mid term of your life; it’s more like you’re sandwiched in the middle of a family, and having to make sure that you, as the filling, is substantial enough to create a wholesome, digestible, and sustainable consumable! It’s like any phase of life – completely envelops you whilst you’re going through it and yet when it has (inevitably) passed, you realise the transient quality of every aspect of your life. And as we generally tend to reminisce the past through rose- coloured spectacles, I’ll choose to remember this holiday in terms of the beauty of deep, parker-blue ink of the Shannon; the freshness of the breeze blowing my hair; and the insightful things I learned about my (Irish) family heritage – the sort of things that only crop- up during heart –to- heart conversations. I could focus on the bickering of the last biscuit in the barrel, when we were all of an hour away from the next port and fresh supplies; or the reluctance to help out on the ropes as we approached yet another lock… But I won’t. I choose to keep alive the sense of freedom that comes with the exploring of new places; to maintain the expanse of my own personal horizon; and to incorporate the fresh outlook and new experiences into the next phase of my life. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=8 Helen Noble Fri, 4 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT There’s a commitment, that once taken up, cannot be relinquished. It is a unique, lifetime contract; and there is only one party to the agreement – your good self! The nature of its demands, rewards and responsibilities will change over time, however, to some extent, a mother is always bound by the original terms. There are broadly two grounds of responsibilities covered by the contract of motherhood, the elements of doing; and the elements of being. The doing bits include the manual labour tasks such as feeding; clothing and chauffeuring. These are the express terms; however don’t forget the implied terms, such as requirements for attendance at school concerts and other such social functions. These tasks are readily identifiable, as like the household chores of cleaning and ironing, they can at times be contracted out to third parties, usually for a cash payment. However, then we come to the being bits, which are far more tricky to define and perform; and absolutely impossible to quantify in monetary terms. There’s the nurture aspect – which is far more the sum of the parts of feeding, clothing and general transportation. Nurturing includes creating a psychological space in which a child can feel safe, play and so grow; whilst you play the part of objective observer and positive, gentle guide. This is a highly skilled, crucial aspect to the process, however I’ve yet to see it detailed in any job specification. Then there’s the listening part…this is especially hard to apply, as it requires the qualities of patience, tolerance and acceptance; and at other times, quiet disapproval. I‘ve yet to come across any training courses offered covering these invaluable skills. Then there’s the intention part. The what? This bit is like the spirit of the agreement, the undercurrent that carries us through the journey of mother/father/parenthood. This is like the whole basis of the contract – we agree (with ourselves) to create/produce/supply a being fit for purpose, with a satisfaction guarantee. However there is no returns or refund policy… This is quite possibly the hardest-to-keep part-of-the-bargain! Consistent levels of unconditional positive regard are a non- negotiable requirement for this aspect of the contract. And so to the consideration aspect...after all there is no contract without due consideration! Just ensure you give yourself and your child(ren) as much consideration as possible prior to creating the clauses for the greatest transaction of your life. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=9 Helen Noble Mon, 10 Aug 2009 00:00:00 GMT Bullying – it affects many from all walks of life, and not just younger people. I previously worked at a prison, which received an award for its successful anti-bullying policy to protect prisoners; yet where many allegations of bullying were made against the managers, by members of staff. In terms of personal experience, I once found myself backed up against a school toilet wall, being threatened by a girl telling me all sorts of nasty, untrue things about myself. Largely, I believe, because I had beaten her to win first place in the primary school long jump competition the previous year; and had just been elected captain of the netball team in our first year of secondary school. I told her that what she was saying was simply not true, and without any satisfactory resistance or retaliation from me, she had nowhere to go with it except to back off. Some fifteen years later we came face to face in an aerobics class at the local sports centre. By this time, we were both married with children and still living in the same area. I could feel her burning stare and she could not resist coming over to talk to me. I was polite, but the tension was apparent – she was still harbouring negative thoughts and feelings about me. Again I just refused to accept her distorted view of me and walked away. Some believe that bullies are motivated by feelings of jealousy; others that it is a desperate attempt at an underhand exerting of social control. Statistics show that you are most likely to be subjected to bullying behaviour by someone of the same sex and of a similar age to you. The ways in which males and females bully differ in that boys and men tend to use physical intimidation and violence, whereas females use emotional manipulation and violence. Also, females who bully as children, often continue their undesirable behaviour into adulthood in the form of malicious gossiping. Regarded by some sociologists as a social weapon, malicious gossip is a strategy often used by individuals to further their own reputations and selfish interests at the expense of others. In the study of early societies, it was noted that the manipulation of public opinion through gossip, ridicule and ostracism became a key way of keeping potentially dominant group members in a positions that were believed to be personally beneficial to the gossip hounds ;in line with their perception of life as a social competition. However, negative gossip about third parties, who of course have no opportunity to defend themselves, is a dangerous game that can rebound on the gossiper. To be good at malicious gossip requires a high degree of subtlety and skill. The trick is to appear to be sympathetic to the victim while actually intending to destroy any positive regard held by others towards her. Failing that, the bully herself will often masquerade as the victim, sometimes actually genuinely believing that she has the moral high ground, whilst seeking to lower the social status of the other to the gutter. However, psychological research has shown that a phenomenon known as ‘spontaneous trait transfer’ (STT) occurs during the act of malicious gossiping. Essentially, when you gossip about another person the listener unconsciously associates you with the character traits you are describing. The characteristics you are gossiping about are actually attributed to you, and not your intended victim. If you are not sure whether your gossiping is the malicious, self-defeating type, just ask your self three questions: • is the information something negative about a third party that isn't there to defend her/him self? • Does passing on this information make you feel that you are better than the person you are talking about? • Are you using the information that you are passing along to better your own appearance in some way? If the answer to these questions is yes, then you might need to reconsider your ineffective strategy. One thing to do might be to talk people 'up' rather than gossiping in a destructive manner. That way, courtesy of STT, you might actually achieve your aim of getting someone else to think more highly of you. The law of reciprocity clearly states that what you give out comes back tenfold. So if you just cannot refrain from gossiping, always bear in mind that it may be your turn to be the subject of gossip tomorrow. If you are finding it a hard habit to break, why not start with a gossip free day every week? Look for positive ways of discussing people within your sphere. If you don't know a lot about the people around you, open your mind, drop out the judgements and preconceptions; and practise your listening skills. Always make eye contact with the person you are speaking to and concentrate on what is being conveyed in the moment, and not what you believe to have happened in the past. If, after due consideration of all these factors, you still cannot find anything positive, helpful or constructive to say, do yourself and the rest of the world a favour, and save your breath. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=10 Helen Noble Mon, 27 Jul 2009 00:00:00 GMT Way back, when I was in sixth form studying English literature, one thing I remember very clearly is the attitude of my teacher to creative writing. When someone asked her if she wrote her own ‘stuff’, she announced rather proudly that if she couldn’t write as well as Shakespeare, she thought it best not to write at all. Therefore the study of ‘A’ level English consisted largely of the academic process of reading and regurgitating the opinions of critics on the books and poems chosen for us by examiners. That was the easy part. However, it was also rather boring. We were allowed one, individual critique of a previously unread poem during the actual exam – which was treated by most of the class with great suspicion and fear. So used to being spoon fed with the opinions of others, we had little experience to enable us to approach the task with confidence. And that was the full extent to which we expected to apply our own thoughts and feelings in our study of English literature. It prompted me to ponder what is the role of literature, art and music if not to provoke an emotional response in the reader/viewer/listener? The year I sat the exam, the great ‘unseen’ was the poem ‘Futility’ by Wilfred Owen. Set amongst the killing fields of the first world war, a piece which reflected nothing of the life experience of a class of teenagers living in the Welsh valleys in the late 1980s. Therefore quite possibly a futile exercise in itself… Inspiration came rather unexpectedly in the form of a new headmaster with an interest in Japanese culture and literary tradition. Another presentation of something seemingly totally unrelated to the life experience of a bunch of insular welsh teenagers, you may think? However, he presented us with the creative opportunity in the form of a Haiku competition. Haiku is a Japanese, un-rhyming verse form of poetry, conveying a complete image or feeling in just three lines of syllables; and is usually concerned with nature or natural things. Although to some it seemed too constricting and ‘alien’ a format; for me it had the effect of opening up a whole new world of writing possibilities. This one exercise served like a portal into another dimension for me. It taught me to concentrate on the conveying of meaning with as few words as possible. It also made me realize that literary critique appears easier as there is a already an apparent ’whole’ to evaluate; whereas the fear of apparent ‘nothingness’ at the start of the creative process often stops people taking the plunge and composing something original. Perhaps closely compounded with fear of the reductionist review of the critics. However, the most successful original creations also have a structure; their roots are based in reality and their message is often conveyed with meaning in a clear, simplistic, manner or form. Critique has its place, but for me it fills a rather small space in the grand scheme of things. Give me the wide-open opportunity to create rather than critique any time. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=11 Helen Noble Sat, 25 Jul 2009 00:00:00 GMT I was out to dinner with friends a few weeks ago; when the subject of IQ levels came up in conversation, over the curry. IQ is a relatively stable indicator of your level of intellectual ability. If you test the same person over a period of time, the final figure will remain largely the same, despite the inevitable processes of learning and experience that have taken place in that person’s life. However, current research has shown that IQ rating accounts for only 4-10% of career success and is no indicator whatsoever of your level of happiness* Over the last ten years or so it has become accepted that human thinking and feeling cannot be separated. We just cannot make rational decisions without our emotions exerting some influence over our choices** You can now test your level of emotional intelligence (EQ) and see where your strengths and weaknesses lie; and there are numerous exercise you can use to develop your ability in this area. Whereas rational, deductive, decision -making is believed to take place in the left side of the brain; the right side of the brain is believed to be the keeper of the overall picture; the place where your empathy originates; and from where your ability to see from different perspectives can help you create a joke. Some forty years of research in this area has served to confirm this ‘common sense’ belief that high levels of humorous ability are usually indicative of high levels of emotional intelligence. Whereas the negative use of humour, such as sarcasm and bullying can be hugely detrimental to any relationship; positive use of humour by managers can serve to reduce hostility; deflect criticism; relieve tension; improve morale; and communicate difficult messages more effectively in the workplace*** Should you ever find yourself in a position to do so, I would highly recommend you take the opportunity to appreciate the humour in any situation; and so have the last laugh! *Daniel Goleman **Antonio Damasio *** Fabio Sala as quoted in Daniel Pink's 'A Whole New Mind" http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=12 Helen Noble Wed, 8 Jul 2009 00:00:00 GMT Who’s holding you back? Chances are, when you open your eyes wide and look around, you will realize that, ultimately the only person who can hold you back is yourself. However you may not be aware that the silent, stealthy determinant of your (in)ability to act is in fact your very own value/belief system. Once we have formed a basic value or belief, unless challenged, we will continue to live our life in accordance with the rule of that belief. For example, if we have accepted or decided that we are ‘not the sporty type’; we will filter any new information that comes our way in the form of ‘evidence’ to support the belief. If approached to participate in a sporting event for charity, we might say, ‘that’s not my sort of thing’; or even ‘that’s not me’. And even if we were persuaded to join in a charity run, we would not set ourselves any goal other than to bring up the rear and cross the line… eventually! This ‘blinkeredness’ happens due to the workings of the ‘Reticular Activating System’ (RAS), a cluster of brain cells that act like a radar system activated by our beliefs or goals. The RAS filters in information that is consistent with what we believe, and filters out anything that does not support our thoughts; which we then back up by using self- talk in the form of negative automatic thoughts (NATs) such as ‘I knew that was going to happen’; ‘That always happens to me’; ‘I’m no good at doing that sort of thing.’
 Together, our RAS and self-talk form a ‘comfort zone’ that represents the limits of our ability, as based on our life- long held beliefs. And here we will stay, in the ‘comfort’ of ‘I can’t’ until we change it and actually saying, well perhaps ‘I can’! This self-limiting cycle is not indestructible! Positive change starts with becoming aware of the beliefs that serve to hold us back and then raising to the challenge of positive change. We can actually choose consciously to set ourselves free of our self- limiting beliefs by subscribing to new, positive values and beliefs. That’s not to say that we can magically overcome the facts of a situation, but we can choose how to respond to the facts – in a positive or a negative way. We are responsible for setting the parameters of our filters and we are very highly tuned into the thoughts and /or feelings that act as trip switches affecting our motivation. For example as much as I love the thought of becoming a world- class athlete – the odds are really against me given my age; current level of fitness; and family and business responsibilities. However, these same factors bear no such constraints on my ability to embark on a personal fitness regime, which will result in me feeling fitter, healthier and generally happier about my lot in life, if I so choose. I can choose to just step onto the cross- trainer and programme in 40 minutes of fat burning, knowing that however I feel at the moment, I will feel energized and pleased with myself in 40 minutes time (positive trip switch); or I can tell myself I haven’t got the time or energy to do that today, what with everything else on my agenda, (negative trip switch) and pour myself another large cappuccino. However, it is important to note that not all decisions leading to failure to participate in an activity are the results of negative self –beliefs. For example, I have no inkling, whatsoever, to take up football training or play in a football team, and I am quite happy about this. This is not an example of a self-limiting belief serving to spoil my fun. I have no deeply held desire to b a world class footballer, therefore not achieving this never crosses my mind, makes me think ‘what if…’ or hanker after long-lost opportunities I may have passed on. If a situation is causing you some consternation, if you are in the habit of thinking, ‘what if..’; or ‘I wish I had…” then the chances are that you have become a victim of your own self-limiting beliefs; that you have found yourself saying ‘no’ to an opportunity, when some part of you really wanted to say ‘yes please!’ Ultimately, the only person who can really let you down is yourself, and the person who wields the greatest power in your life, the only person who can give you what you really want, or take you to where you want to be - is YOU! So be nice to yourself; give yourself a break and see what positive changes you can make, for your own benefit! http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=13 Helen Noble Sun, 21 Jun 2009 00:00:00 GMT ‘Have you considered ‘tall poppy syndrome?'asked my New Zealand- born Mentor. I was researching a psychology project on the effective management of ‘difficult people’ and was looking for theories and models on which to base my practical applications. I had never heard of it. Hardly surprising as it is an Australasion concept, accounting for the unpleasant, negative behaviour of people who feel envy, jealousy and covetousness in the face of the success of others. In the Southern Hemisphere, a tall poppy is a successful person or achiever who, as a result, becomes the target of jealousy and grudging remarks. Although the intention of the poppy hater is to make themselves feel better by insisting that everyone is the same; the actual result is no one strives to be great or lives by their belief that change is possible, due to the consequential negative behaviour, as displayed by others. Thus, tall poppy syndrome can be viewed as a tendency of some to discredit or disparage those who have achieved wealth or prominence; justified by their distorted belief that the poppy is a showy flower whose appearance does not represent real worth. However, this same syndrome is strongly in evidence here in the Northern Hemisphere – take our current celebrity and political cultures as examples. The popular press have a predictable dynamic of ‘building up’ an individual with lots of TV coverage and column inches; only to revel in the orchestration of their fall from grace some time later. In the workplace tall poppy syndrome may manifest in the reluctance of individuals to share new ideas; or to hold back from instigating new practices in anticipation of the inevitable negative response they will get from their (less able) colleagues. The truth is that career or business success takes courage as reaching your goals can sometimes put you in conflict - real or perceived - with others with similar or diverse goals. Others who feel threatened by your success may behave in a devious and dishonest ways, and in the extreme may resort to malicious sabotage, in an attempt to stultify your achievements and further their own ends. It takes courage to stand up for what you believe in; trust in your own judgement and hold steadfast to your own sense of self-worth in the face of negative, debilitating resistance from others. So what can be done to combat this insidious syndrome? Jodyanne Kirkwood
of the Department of Management, University of Otago, Dunedin, New Zealand believes that effective ways of reducing the impact of tall poppy syndrome on entrepreneurs consist of: · Celebrating their success more visibly · Highlighting realistic role models to inspire people and · Emphasizing the hard work and the risks taken by entrepreneurs to achieve success As Benjamin Franklin noted, "You cannot strengthen one by weakening another; and you cannot add to the stature of a dwarf by cutting off the leg of a giant.” And you can’t stop a wild poppy from blooming, season after season, by seeking to chop off its beautiful head! Feather, N. T. (1989) Attitudes towards the high achiever: The Fall of the Tall Poppy. Australian Journal of Psychology, 41,pgs.239-267 Benjamin Franklin (1890 -1962) Respectfully Quoted: A Dictionary of Quotations http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=14 Helen Noble Sun, 7 Jun 2009 00:00:00 GMT School holidays/work responsibilities/studying – an almost impossible mix? Impossible – only if you are a parent who strives to achieve a high level of input/output in all of these areas simultaneously; and expect to feel deliriously happy all the time. Speaking with other working mums the word ‘guilt’ almost always creeps in at some point during the conversation. I say ‘creeps’ as guilt is such an insidious notion – one that only serves to undermine any achievement and create a state of misery for all concerned. Research has shown that the life expectancy of working women has not been reduced; that having meaningful work to do is associated with higher levels of psychological wellbeing; and that working and caring for a family does not necessarily cause higher levels of stress or ill health. Also, recent research into the experience of parents has indicated that the level of happiness drops to its lowest around the first birthday of the child(ren) and remains low until around the fourth birthday. It has been suggested that around this time parents tend to feel more content with parenthood and no less happier than their years BC (before children!) Whereas we remember the incidents associated with children that make us happy – their first words and steps; school and sporting achievements; and perhaps their own marriage and parenthood; these incidents are rare pearls in the overall experience of parenthood as far more of our time and attention is actually tied up with the more monotonous elements of care and nurture. Constantly having to put the needs and wants of those in our care before our own is an on-going challenge for the majority of us; although like any other skill it can be developed. However those striving for perfectionism often experience higher levels of anxiety and eventually depression. Irrational feelings of guilt are a well-known symptom of depression and eventually serve to debilitate if untreated. Twenty years ago whilst studying sociology I stumbled across a book titled ‘A Good Enough Parent’ by Bruno Bettelheim. This empowering concept has stayed with me throughout my own experiences of motherhood, serving to encourage me back on track when I have wandered off down some pathway signposted ‘self pity’; and was recently reinforced by Daniel Gilbert’s ideas in ‘Stumbling on Happiness’. As it follows that your level of happiness will necessarily impact on the wellbeing of those in your care, I believe that this is one of those juggled elements that needs to stay in the air… http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=15 Helen Noble Sun, 24 May 2009 00:00:00 GMT ‘I’ve just started writing a blog on The Western Telegraph website’, I told a few friends recently. Their responses ranged from a disinterested ‘Oh yeah’; to a sulky ‘wish I had the time to do stuff like that’; and a more positive ‘That’s good!’ Then someone asked ‘why?’ Why blog? Well, I like reading; enjoy learning new things; I love writing and I value sharing new ideas. Then I was challenged with the assertion that ‘you can do all that in the real world, with real people’. Yes I can -at the office; in the supermarket; at school social events; in the pub. I also like being able to grasp useful bits of information and entertainment at the click of a mouse – at my convenience – whether I’m in the office; working from/or relaxing at home. I can, at any time of day or night read whatever someone anywhere in the world has decided to write and enter into a discussion or dialogue if I so wish. And if I don’t like what I’m reading I can just scroll on by… We humans are fickle creatures, constantly craving the stimulation of something new. We also all have a basic need to communicate our thoughts and feelings to others; and blogging is a very convenient and effective way to achieve this. A recent piece of research into 'cyber behaviour' concluded that '...blogging does not diminish substantial relations in real life but...helps to enhance bloggers' existing relations through social bonding'. For the scientific evidence of the psychological benefits of blogging check out this piece of research and blog on! http://www.liebertonline.com/doi/abs/10.1089/cpb.2008.016 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=16 Helen Noble Sun, 17 May 2009 00:00:00 GMT Are you following in the footsteps of Fred, or Ginger? Recently, whilst reading a book titled ‘Women at the Top’, one sentence seemed to jump off the page and tap me right on the cha cha. ‘Ginger Rogers…did everything Fred Astaire did…backwards and in high heels’. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t subscribe to hard- core feminism, but I do believe that if you don’t value or appreciate your own worth, it may, quite possibly, go unnoticed. Not that I believe in daily trumpeting from the parapets either – especially if you have nothing useful to say. For me, confidence is not necessarily a loud voice – sometimes it’s more like a quiet conviction, that still small voice of calm inside your head. That’s where I’m coming from…and what I’m trying to say here is that, I think we can choose to see the Fred and Ginger scenario from the perspective of unfairness – as in she did half the work and he got all the glory. Or, we can appreciate the superb skills demonstrated by both and realise that the resulting performance was a necessary mix of the two. Neither could have achieved anything without the other. I guess the point is that as long as you are able to happy to be playing your part, then the ‘show’ will always go on. The steps we take are all within our control, and to that end we can place ourselves in the shoes of the leader, or the follower, as and when we so choose. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=17 Helen Noble Thu, 7 May 2009 00:00:00 GMT Ever second- guess yourself? For example, when you have an instantaneous inkling of how to deal with a situation or person, do you then put your own decision on hold, deferring to the advice of another on the subject? Maybe someone who doesn’t have all the information or the insight that you have; and therefore cannot possibly formulate a more informed choice than your good self? Perhaps you have, on the advice of another, taken a duff decision and realised it before the actual deed was done… followed swiftly by a severe session of self-berating? I guess (and not for the first time!) that we have all followed this pattern to varying degrees at some point in our lives. Some of us may have learned, early on, that self-mis-trust is not the best way to go. Others amongst us might just be waking up to the fact that we can, quite safely, listen to that ‘inner voice’; ‘intuition’ – call it what you like. Yes there will always be room for consulting an expert; approaching an authority or mulling things over with well-meaning friend. However, the final decision will always rest with your good self. It will inevitably be you who carries the can, or act as the stop sign for that buck…so why not have confidence in your ability to make the right decision and take full responsibility for it? Trust your innate judgements; give yourself space to explore your self- generated options and then proudly position your own decisions in first place. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=18 Helen Noble Tue, 5 May 2009 00:00:00 GMT Washing the dishes can bring on the most serious of conditions – it really should carry a hazard warning. As I gently wiped the last knife- edge clean of its residue, I became overwhelmed with the realisation that this was the start of my life, or more particularly, the beginning of the next phase. Something has shifted deep within me and I felt that things would never be the same – that I was on a new path to somewhere. It was like a layer had been peeled back and lots of past events were rising to prominence in my mind’s eye, the glint of intuition reflected sharply by the shiny blade. So much goes unsaid; and yet is still known. Patterns appear in relationships; in the behaviour of close people of differing generations; history does sometimes appear to repeat itself. And with the recognition of knowing, the future appears to be taking on a new form – you start to see things from a different perspective; your thoughts so clear and your feelings so strong, that it is pointless to try to deny or dismiss the changes afoot. This is the start of something new. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=19 Helen Noble Mon, 27 Apr 2009 00:00:00 GMT As a teenager I was highly influenced by John Pilger’s 1986 book “Heroes”. As an introduction to investigative journalism, it both greatly informed, and inspired me. I guess the most powerful ‘message’ I took from it was to appreciate the strength, courage and integrity that actually comprises the lives of the apparent ‘ordinary’ people in this world. Recently I have been fortunate to experience, up close and personally, the amazing emergency services at work; and it served as a timely reminder of all of the good people and the selfless work that is happening all around us, unseen and unheard for most of the time. Perhaps it’s time to speak out a bit louder and more frequently about the quieter people amongst us; the ones who don’t feature in your daily life, until a situation arises when the assistance of the genuine, compassionate nature of us humans is exactly the help that is needed. We are fickle creatures, easily bored and always on the look out for the new, the novel and exciting; and yet it’s often the quiet people who perform the most awesome acts of humanity. Perhaps it's time for a fundamental change, lets celebrate the quiet heroes for once. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=20 Helen Noble Mon, 6 Apr 2009 00:00:00 GMT When I started writing this piece, I soon realised that the initial motivation for my efforts was, essentially, of a negative nature. As is my way in writing, I tend to start with a concept or if I’m not sure of the nature or extent of the concept I tend to bullet point words and sentences. The first three looked like this: • Unprofessional • Inappropriate • Unacceptable So I guess I was starting from the point of narrowing the definition of integrity by stating some of the qualities that denote a lack of integrity. The first one being unprofessional is maybe a little misleading in that not all situations in which someone can evidence a lack of integrity is necessarily within a professional setting. However, integrity in business or the workplace, is surely only possible if integrity is practiced in all aspects of life? I say ‘practiced’ as integrity is, perhaps, both an internal default setting and a learned behaviour. Some people may have a predisposition to integrity whereas others may learn that it is a far more fortuitous way to interact with others. So what is integrity? • Congruence in thought, word and deed • Saying what you are thinking and doing what you say • Being true to your real thoughts and feelings – being authentic • Feeling certain of your boundaries and fully accepting responsibility for the consequences of your actions And can it be learned? I believe it can be modelled, maybe mimicked, but can it be effectively practised over an extended period of time unless it has been internalised? I guess that is the test. So when/how is our integrity subject to testing? Perhaps when we are finding it difficult to be honest with someone about something? We sacrifice our own well-being and choose to be in discomfort with ourselves to avoid the perceived discomfort we believe we will experience at the display of displeasure by another. When we are resisting the taking of self-responsibility in some way, be it in a personal, health or professional context. There is a quiet, reminding thought or feeling that we try to ignore or stifle and on occasions we challenge! And how do we know when we are dealing with someone else who is struggling with integrity? I tend to feel a sense of shifting sands as opposed to terra firma when a lack of integrity enters the interactive dynamic. Other experiences may seem like the shifting of goal –posts or the constant changing of explanations, production of conflicting evidence. When faced with such confusing situations I find it easiest to stand back from the situation, allow some time and space to enter the equation and then to concentrate on the actions of the person concerned as opposed to their words. If there is inconsistency between their actions and words, then there may also be inconsistency between their words and thoughts. A state of integrity, like all states, must be subject to flux. However, for me, integrity has a texture of consistency; a strength of clarity; a feeling of calm; and a pervasive sense of resolution. A natural wholeness. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=21 Helen Noble Mon, 23 Mar 2009 00:00:00 GMT Today in Johannesburg, South Africa, a memorial is to be held in honour of inspirational heroine Helen Suzman. From 1961 to 1974, Helen was the sole parliamentary representative for the liberal Progressive party, opposing apartheid. Known as the ‘cricket in the thorn tree’ for her insistence on ‘speaking truth to power with a clear moral purpose’, Helen has been honoured worldwide by universities; with exhibitions; awarded the United Nations award for Human Rights ; and twice nominated for the Nobel Peace prize. In his autobiography 'Long Walk to Freedom', Nelson Mandela stated that Helen was the first and only woman to grace the cells of Robben Island prison and referred to her as ‘a remarkable South African woman’. At Parktown Convent, Johannesburg from where Helen graduated, a rose garden honouring "her lifelong struggle for justice and human rights for all South Africans" was unveiled in 2003; also the Helen Suzman Rose (Foxy Lady) with baby pink buds unfolding to light pink-white flowers, has been named after her. Helen is honoured for her sparkling, yet resolute nature; and her deep commitment to, and love for, the causes of justice, human rights and peace. Her life’s work, where she ‘shone the bright light of truth in every nook and cranny of (her) beloved country's tortured past with commitment and fortitude’, is an example of what can be achieved by just one individual’s empowering, passionate, desire for change. How do you wish to be remembered? Helen Suzman 07/11/1917 – 01/01/09 http://www.hsf.org.za http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=22 Helen Noble Sun, 1 Mar 2009 00:00:00 GMT Creativity is essentially a social act. For a work of art; piece of music; poem; scientific concept; or social network to exist, there must be a meeting of the minds of the originators and the appreciators. Meaningful understanding and subsequent appreciation can only be communicated when there exists a group of people to ‘validate’ the efforts of an individual; and the number or nature of the group will vary in relation to the nature of the novel item concerned. *For example, it has been said that it took the entire population of the US to decide whether the recipe for New Coke was an innovation worth keeping; whereas it has also been claimed that a mere 5 five people in the world initially understood Einstein’s Theory of Relativity. There is much discussion about what constitutes a creative personality, yet far less about the optimal context in which creativity may flourish. Goethe stated his belief that the quality or state of naïveté is the most important attribute of genius; indeed openness, and fluidity of thinking are core facets of divergent thinking. However, it has been observed that highly creative thinkers can also successfully apply convergent thinking processes when it is necessary. Also, creative personalities are now thought to be far more paradoxical. For example, Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi believes that ‘creative individuals alternate between imagination and fantasy…and a rooted sense of reality’*. This can be illustrated by Randy Pausch’s description of his sense of ‘balance in [his] life between aspiration and pragmatism’** Successful, creative individuals are able to inhabit the extremes of emotion and behaviour easily and fully. This suggests that essentially, their energy is within their control and subject to their own internal rhythms, as opposed to being externally dictated to and controlled by deadlines or dates. However, creativity is rooted in a wide knowledge base and as Randy Pausch points out ‘ you’ve got to get the fundamentals down…otherwise the fancy stuff is not going to work’** It is crucial to have a deep and contemporary understanding of your area(s) of interest if you want to create something unique. An informed piece of work that offers a fresh insight is the most easily recognisable and therefore most instantly appreciated by others. However, the very existence of ‘others’ is also a crucial variable in the formula for creative success. Good connections with others in your ‘field’ may serve to determine the nature and quality of openings or breaks that come your way; a phenomenon which appears to have stood the test of time – ‘Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity’, Seneca 5 BC. However, once the opportunity has knocked so to speak, how do you make sure that door remains open long enough for people to peer into your room and perhaps want to venture in? Here’s where the novelty factor can be utilised as an effective wedge. Humans are attuned to seek out the new, as the new is often initially fun and exciting; and given that excitement and enthusiasm are highly contagious, successful engagement with an idea, concept or practice will be determined by the level of enjoyment people experience whilst engaged. Arthur Koestler suggested a triptych of overlapping domains of humour, discovery and art as a model for the act of creation; expounding on the ‘logic of laughter’, he explained how the use of humour can serve to overcome apparent boundaries and so contribute to a creation.*** What’s the role of a new joke or witty observation, other than to provoke an emotional response in another human? Perhaps a response that might lead to a dialogue in which common ground is discovered and a meaningful connection established? The assertion that ‘what makes a novel idea creative is that that once we see it, sooner or later we recognise that as strange as [it may seem], is it is [in fact] true’*, somewhat nicely sums up the social-interactive nature of the whole process for me. * Csikszentmihalyi, M. ‘Creativity’ 1997 p. 43 ** Pausch, R. ‘The Last Lecture’ 2008 ***Koestler, A. ‘The Act of Creation’ 1964 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=23 Helen Noble Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:00:00 GMT As the 19th Century German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, said: ‘He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how'. Meaning in life is no longer a social given, but a matter of personal choice; it has to be constructed from an ever increasing range of options. Positive psychologist Martin Seligman argues that one necessary condition for meaning is the attachment to something larger than the self, and the larger that entity, the more meaning people can derive. It has been asserted* that we can choose to go with the flow of personal ambition, distraction and gratification. This can be a pleasant enough existence, particularly if nothing goes wrong and we keep getting what we think we want; but it is a life that lacks depth and resilience and comes at a price to others and at a cost to the future. With many people believing that human ability is shaped by personality traits and early childhood experiences, Kuhn's** approach to the issue, essentially asking the question 'how can the school can serve to assist children with their development and creation of a meaningful existence' is an enlightening perspective. Kuhn notes that children’s development of self-understanding and the influence of family and community on their development deserve examination; but so does the nature of school itself, in terms of the meaning that children make of it. She suggests two ways to increase the likelihood that school will make sense to students. One is to centre the curriculum on educational activities whose purpose and value are readily apparent to the children, such as the intellectual tools of inquiry and argument. Teaching them the processes of achievement and letting them work things out for themselves, so that they experience the use and value of the tools first-hand - teaching them HOW to think as opposed to WHAT to think. In this way we would be equipping our children with the power to think for themselves and to attune their skills in the direction of their authentic interest. Secondly, Kuhn believes that schooling needs to bear more relevance to the adult life for which it is intended to prepare the developing individual. It has long been evident that people learn more effectively when the context of a learning situation is relevant to their actual, contemporary, life experience. Kuhn believes that one of the most important things adults can do for older children may be to make sure that their educational experience is the kind that they can readily make sense of, as opposed to depending on reassurances from teachers or parents that they are doing ‘the right thing’. She equates such efforts as important in promoting a child’s future success as anything a parent or carer does, or fails to do, in the early pre-school years. Thus with careful consideration of how and what we ask of our children, with an emphasis at all times of the meaning of the situation for all parties, we can achieve a more coherent, meaningful and therefore fulfilling outcome for all concerned. Eckersley* believes that the inherent human quest for meaning is such as 'we know in our hearts what is important and what is right'. He asserts that ‘there has never been a period in human history when so much hangs in the balance between what is and what might be, when so much depends on the choices we make as individuals, when it is so clear that we are, each of us, ‘decision-makers’ in deciding the destiny of humankind. It is a time, then, that offers so much meaning. And yet, because of the pressures, preoccupations and priorities of life today, we don’t sense this significance of the moment - or sensing it, seem unable to hold it and be inspired by it. This is one of the most profound paradoxes of our times'. Whether or not this is the case, we can all surely see the virtue of making the right choices and finding more meaning in our existences? And if so, nurturing the meaning makers of the future, shaping their lives through the medium of meaning is a human given? *Richard Eckersley, National Centre for Epidemiology and Population Health at the Australian National University. (Australian Quarterly), vol 72, Issue 1, February-March 2000, pp. 16-19. ** Deanna Kuhn ‘How to Produce a High Achieving Child’ June 2007 ‘Kuhn-AG-20p3’ http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=24 Helen Noble Mon, 9 Feb 2009 00:00:00 GMT Do you wish your children, or those of others, were ‘better behaved’? According to research* conducted by a team of over 71 educational psychologists, primary school pupils in the UK are better behaved than ‘ever before’ whilst performing classroom tasks. And the reasons? The verbal behaviour of the teachers was also analysed; and it was found that they provided almost three times as much positive verbal feedback to the children as previous research had indicated. A link was established between the verbal energy and skill of teachers; the frequency with which they verbally interacted with the class; and the positive behaviour displayed by the children. Attention was also focussed on non-verbal behaviour, such as eye contact, tone of voice, rhythm of verbal stress and intonation; and physical presence of the teacher. It was deduced that effective teachers did not use fear or shame based communication to ensure submissive compliance, they engaged in frequent, positive, rewarding and constructive support for the children’s efforts. This is a valuable lesson for parents and others living and/or working with children in general. Positive engagement will prompt positive responses and progress. * as reported in the editorial section of The Psychologist, February 2009, vol 22 no 2 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=25 Helen Noble Sun, 1 Feb 2009 00:00:00 GMT As with any crisis you only have to scratch the surface and peep at the recovery process to know that all is not lost; and that to pick out the positives in any given situation is to maximise your opportunities. 'Executive jobs in several sectors expected to grow in 2009' According to data released by the Association of Executive Search Consultants (AESC) several market sectors are expected to strengthen in 2009 despite the current world economic crisis. Nearly a third (32%) of search consultants involved in the AESC research believe that executive job opportunities will increase in the healthcare sector. Search consultants also expect to see an increase in opportunities in the government, pharmaceuticals/biotech and natural resources fields. Recruiting demand in the non-profit, education, professional services, media/entertainment and information technology sectors are expected to remain stable. Furthermore, the AESC members involved in the research predict that the global executive job market will rebound in the second half of 2009. Peter Felix, President of the AESC, comments: “Despite the current state of the global economy, our members still see several bright spots for executive hiring in 2009. Other sectors will begin to step up their executive hiring as the current uncertainty dissipates and greater optimism begins to work its way into boardrooms. “Typically executive search is an early indicator of renewed strength in the economy as organizations either upgrade or begin to invest in new executive talent. Given the extreme talent shortage which was being experienced in many sectors globally until the end of the third quarter last year our members are optimistic that strategic recruiting will pick up by the second half of the year.” So if this is your thing, what are you waiting for? Article courtesy of research by Gladeana Mcmahon http://www.gladeanamcmahon.com/ http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=26 Helen Noble Fri, 30 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT Do you see yourself as a link in a tenuous chain that could break at any time? Do you look at all of your connections and wonder which ones are perhaps more robust than others? When you detect a loosening bond is it your way to try and fix it; take control by severing it in your own time; or do you just sit back and watch it unravel… I’m sure we have all responded in a variety of ways at different times, but is there a discernable pattern in our responses? And if so, is it one that serves us well? Or is it time for a change? Trust - it’s a tricky, tangled issue. So many threads interwoven; and once a weakness in the mix has been detected, surely there has to be a risk assessment as to the knock on effect for all concerned? And can a breach ever be satisfactorily secured, smoothed over so to speak, so all feel confident once again? Will the new bond be stronger, weaker, or just different from its predecessor? Any insights greatly appreciated: helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=27 Helen Noble Wed, 28 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT Warning! I can make you thinK! In fact, anyone or anything has the power to prompt your cognitive processes, to coach your cogitation; all you have to be is open to new possibilities, all you have to do is focus your intention. So what about feelings and emotions? Are they equally, if not more powerful that thoughts? Does the thought result in the feeling, or is it that the feeling prompts the thoughts? That’s somewhat like the chicken and egg question; I would say that some people are more aware of thoughts pre-empting the feeling; whereas others sense the rise of an emotion and then consciously reflect on their thoughts. Some believe that an event, which is outside of our control, can trigger thoughts and feelings, such as winter weather ‘making’ us feel lethargic and depressed. Whereas we can’t control outside influences such as the weather, once we are aware of our patterns of thoughts and emotional responses, we can then choose what we think, how we feel and how we re-act. There is a constant, dynamic interplay between environmental stimuli, our thoughts, emotions and behaviours. Being highly aware of our thoughts and feelings, as well as to the potential provocations of our surroundings, helps contribute to our ability to live more fully in each moment, to experience a greater degree of connectedness and satisfaction. So why not try the latest fashion; follow the trend; develop a new habit? Awareness addiction is the new black, the coolest way to stand out in a crowd whilst simultaneously remaining conscious of those warm connections surrounding and supporting us. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=28 Helen Noble Thu, 15 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT Witnessing the advent of dawn in Africa, from a hot air balloon ride over the sultry Oudshoorn plain; or watching the construction of the Cape town waterfront development from the summit of Table Mountain; discussing life experiences with a confused Afrikaner living in the UK, yet longing to return to his country of birth; a retired English holiday maker whose attitudes are reminiscent of the 1970’s state of Apartheid; an African artist fashioning pictures from rubbish; or a former political prisoner now offering guided tours around Robben Island, telling how the ANC was born, its leaders educated, and of the triumphant overthrow of the old political order of things; encountering a sign indicating a soup kitchen located within one tin shack amidst thousands in a township; a lone child risking life or limb on the busy road to beg for money; or the opulence of wine tasting in pristine manor houses amidst the succulent mountain vines; informed me that South Africa must surely be one of the greatest living examples of ‘change’ in action. This is a place where divisions of culture and heritage are deeply rooted; yet a local radio station calling itself Good Hope FM 94-97 claims to be ‘connecting Cape town’ This is a place where previously unimaginable social and political change has occurred; and some 15 years on, has now a generation of new voters whose cultural experience is one of increasing tolerance and opportunity. And yet, the number of individuals exercising their democratic right to vote is falling. In a country with an estimated 43% of unemployment and where it is projected that in the year 2012, for the first time in recorded history, the number of people dying will exceed the number being born, people are not choosing to empower themselves. Why? Are the policies of affirmative action; immigration; health care investment and educational provision so unpopular? Is the emerging political party COPE, who are hoping that the time has come to re-address some core political issues, mistaken in their beliefs? Is it a natural period of apathy following a euphoric event – a lull before the next wind of change sweeps dramatically across the country? Are people just watching and waiting to see how the changes pan out once the new generations filter through? I don’t know, but in a place full of dramatic scenery; colourful cultures; a vast range of examples of human experience; and a powerful pulse; I can only think that all change is heartfelt by its people. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=29 Helen Noble Tue, 13 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT Epiphany: from the Greek epiphaneia, meaning appearance or manifestation: as in the manifestation of a deity; or an intuitive grasp of reality through something such as a simple and striking event. This ‘tale’ is told through the eyes of Jed, a life sentence prisoner, and is closely based on true life experiences. Danny is a fellow prisoner and spiritual companion; Alisha is the love of Jed’s life and mother of his son. The scene is set within Danny's cell in a high security prison. Danny once asked me if I ever played the drums. I thought he meant a full-on drum kit, so I was a bit surprised when he pulled out his bodhran, a hollow, wooden, circular instrument with some weird design, 'Celtic', Danny called it, covering the smooth skin stretched over its top. He explained that he’d had it for years, since he was a kid, and every time he was transferred to a new jail, it was confiscated by the staff who were overly suspicious of anything out-of –the –ordinary in prisoners’ cells. It had been subject to regular security checks, but he’d managed to hold onto it. Danny started to tap the drum rhythmically; gently and quietly, while I listened. After a while Danny told me to close my eyes and he started to tell me some weird tale. ‘So you’re walking along this path, right? You’ve turned off the road and you’re cutting along some scrubland, heading towards the woods. The sound of the traffic on the road behind you is fading into the distance and the twigs snapping underfoot are the loudest sound you can hear now. You’re sweating as it’s a hot summers’ day and the sun is beating down on the back of your head as you approach the entrance to the woods. A stillness descends around you and you feel welcomed by the cool shade’. By now I’m staring wide –eyed at Danny, who’s still tapping on his drum, eyes closed. ‘Stay with me on this one Jed’, he said in this firm tone, without opening his eyes. I was used to listening to Danny talking for long periods of time, so I relaxed into what he was saying. I remember him telling me to find a hole in the ground somewhere. ‘Use your imagination’ he said still drumming, eyes closed; and I noticed a bead of sweat forming in the crease of his frown. ‘What do you mean?’ I felt uncomfortable. ‘Think of the last time you were in the woods’. ‘What woods? I ain’t been in any woods’. ‘What, never? Not even as a kid?’ ‘Hey man, I was a city kid…born and bred in brick. Danny looked up from beneath his frown with a curious expression, shrugged and proceeded to explain the significance of getting back to nature. He told me about the shaman doctors who healed people by helping them connect with the ancient spirits of the earth, which often appeared in animal form. ‘So this is some religious shit? Listen, man, I ain’t interested…’ ‘Not religious, spiritual. This stuff isn’t about God or Allah or whoever, it’s about connecting with the earth, the place where we’re all from and where we all end up.’ ‘What’s this got to do with me?’ I asked, half interestedly. ‘It’s a quest, a sort-of-journey people take when they want to know the answer to a question’. I didn’t have any questions. Well, there was one thing on my mind. Impulsively I said ‘Ok, let’s do it’. Danny picked up the beat on the drum and ‘guided’ me towards an old tree stump in the midst of a clearing. I was told to look into it. I could see only black, empty space. ‘If you look carefully, you’ll see grooves dug into the sides. Climb down using your hands and feet, as if you’re on a ladder’, Danny instructed me. I closed my eyes and imagined myself reaching for the grooves. I had expected them to feel muddy, as if made of soil, but it felt more as if I was climbing down on the struts of a wooden ladder. ‘Keep climbing’ Danny reminded me as if he sensed my attention wavering, ‘you’re getting there’. All this time I was conscious of the gentle drum beat in the back round. Curiosity was keeping me going. ‘Ok, stop’ Danny banged the drum once and announced ‘you’ve reached a place, where are you?’ I was in a barn, having just climbed down from a hay loft. ‘What can you see? Look around you’, Danny urged. I could see hay, wooden stalls, and the smell… ‘Are there any animals around?’ I could see something moving behind one of the stalls. It was a horse, stamping one hoof and snorting. ‘Go over to it and ask it a question’. I found myself looking into the face of the horse wondering whether or not Ma had heard the promise I had made to her at her funeral. It was like I was tripping. I knew it wasn’t real, but it was happening. I opened the door to the stall and let the horse out into the barn. It was a magnificent creature, strong and serene. As I stroked its chestnut mane, standing tall and elegant, it started to walk towards an opening at the furthest end of the barn. Momentarily blinded by the strength of the sunlight, as the heavy barn door opened, then I could feel myself astride the creature, eyes closed and head down, as she trotted ahead steadily. As the drum beat picked up and the horse broke into a canter, I leaned into the rhythmic lull with my fingers firmly entwined in the horse’s mane. When she slowed I opened my eyes to see a steep grassy incline ahead. I could feel her struggle to carry my weight to the top of the rise, and gripped tightly when she lost her footing on a few occasions, slipping on the smooth grass under hoof. At the summit, I saw we were perched on a dusty ridge, like the spine of the earth stretching out behind and in front of us as far as the eye could see. To the side was a steep, rocky descent into a fast-flowing river below. For me the way forward was obvious, however the horse was pacing restlessly, as if undecided on which direction to take. I knew at this point that I had no control over this creature; I just had to trust it with my fate. Then the fearful pounding of my heart was drowning out the sound of the drum, as I realised we were heading down amongst the loose lying rocks to the river below. I felt angry and frightened of being dragged down this way, however, those feeling were drowned out by the thunder of the hooves and I could only succumb to the relentless pounding and dodging of the missiles the horse was kicking up around us. As we neared the bottom and she started to slow up I sighed in relief at the realisation that I was surviving. Then the sound of scraping hooves, slipping on wet rocks. We were splashing in the shallow water, heading downstream where the river opened out as an estuary into the sea. I slopped about on the back of the horse, as all my constricted muscles had relaxed , my chest leaning over the horse’s head, breathing deeply and slowly. As the waterway widened in front of us, so the horse’s steps faltered fearfully, before grinding to a halt. I shakily dismounted and bent over to look into the deepening water beneath. I could see Alisha’s face. It was smeared with dirt and tears, her soulful brown eyes now black and sunken. She looked so small and helpless; no longer the strong, feisty woman in face off with me that day in court. I closed my eyes in an attempt to escape Alisha’s image and walked, immersing myself in the water. I was wading in, the icy water rising around me, lapping at my chest and the chill closing in around my neck. I felt a pull too strong to resist and could only bow under the pressure. Then with a sudden gasp, I became aware of the need to breathe. I could hear Danny’s strained voice urging me to ‘come back’ and I coughed and spluttered. Then, feeling that I couldn’t get the water out, I panicked. The next thing I knew there were two officers attempting first aid on me. ‘What brought this on?’ I heard one ask in a panic. ‘I thought he was stable on asthma medication’. ‘I bet he’s been dealing it’, snorted the other. ‘Look, he’s drenched in sweat; put a call out o the net for the doctor’ ‘What’s been going on here, Danny?’ (c) Helen Noble 2008, All rights reserved http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=30 Helen Noble Fri, 19 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT Are you a convergent thinker? Is it important for you to deduce all the relevant information in order to prove a point, QED? This sort of thinking has its place and serves a valid purpose (such as the development of Western medicine, with all of its benefits ); however as with most things, it also has a ‘down side’. The thought process, by design, is exclusive of apparently extraneous considerations, which could, in theory, result in a decision that wasn’t really intended. Or the process could be used to justify an outcome which was well and truly intended, such as the 1701 Act of Settlement which was designed to exclude anyone of the Catholic Religion from sitting on the throne of the then ‘Great Britain’. It’s effect extended to the actual disempowerment of the vast majority of the people of Ireland, as the act clearly states its intention that ‘the said Crown and government shall from time to time descend to and be enjoyed by such person or persons, being Protestants’. This Act, steeped in religious division and exclusion still sits on the statute books today…unchanged in its wording and implications for over 300 years. Time for a change? So, now cast the net of your minds into the open sea of divergent thinking, described by Guilford* as searching about or going off in different directions. This process of thinking is not goal orientated and so free to explore new directions. Jamison* notes that divergent thinking is in essence, fluid, rapid and flexible; with a heightened ability to merge ideas and thoughts which appear to have no conventional connection. Potentially exciting… with the ‘down side’ being that such thinking is highly characteristic of the high or ‘manic’ thinking experienced during bi-polar behaviour (more on the links between creative thinking and mood disorder later). However, divergent or ‘out of the box’ thinking is how the abhorrent African slave trade was abolished by the same parliamentary process one hundred or so years later. Although the high profile campaigning is rightfully credited to William Wilberforce, it was James Stephen, a skilled lawyer specializing in the laws governing Great Britain's foreign trade, who’s divergent thinking led to great change. The text of his book titled ‘War in disguise; or, the frauds of the neutral Flags’ eventually led to the wording of the legislation which effectively abolished the slave trade, where more direct approaches had previously failed. Currently, the developing divergent or creative thinking forms part of the rehabilitation programmes for recidivist offenders within the US and UK, in anattempt to enable prisoners to break their cycle of offending. The message is very simple and direct – diverge to emerge. *Guilford, J.P. (1950). Creativity. American Psychologist, 5, 444-454. ** Kay Jamison ‘An Unquiet Mind’ 1995 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=31 Helen Noble Thu, 11 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT Create your own future; visualise whatever you desire, live in the now and imagine how it will feel when you are living your dream. This is the ‘secret’ to living the life you want whilst you are here in human form on planet earth. Creation, visualisation and momentary awareness are all skills which can be learned and successfully put into practice. As noted by Gilbert * it is the emotional component which causes us difficulties and perhaps serves to hijack the whole process – we are not so good at predicting how a future event will make us feel, especially if it is a situation that is completely novel to us. So how to improve insight into and understanding of our emotional behaviour and its implications? A consideration of emotional intelligence might be a good place to start. As intellectual achievement is linked to IQ scores; happiness and success in all areas of life have been linked to EQ. Emotional intelligence is comprised of a set of skills which are critical for the creation and maintaining of positive, successful relationships. Research has endeavoured to describe the way the brain processes emotions – which, it has been discovered, is similar in nature to the way it processes ideas. The same brain functions that can be seen in intellectual intelligence also apply to emotions, in that there is the equivalent process of interpretation, analysis, reflection, and decision making that occurs on the intellectual plane. Damasio**, amongst others, stresses the importance of one small part of the limbic system of the brain- an almond-shaped cluster called the amygdala in the processing of emotions. He believes that the amygdala can be likened to a ‘storehouse’ of emotional reactions. As he explains it, people without access to or understanding of this storehouse are rather like explorers without a compass or a map; they can spot alternative routes, but they have no idea how to evaluate and therefore make effective use of them. Hence the rise of the Emotional intelligence movement. The early Emotional Intelligence theory was originally developed during the 1970's and 80's by the work and writings of psychologists Gardner, Salovey and Mayer. Whilst a more recent behavioural model of EQ rose to prominence courtesy of Daniel Goldman*** For an accessible and positively human approach to understanding and developing your EQ, check out the information at: http://www.6seconds.org *‘Stumbllng on Happiness’, 2007 **’Descarte’s’ Error: Emotion, Reason and the Human brain’, 1994 *** ‘Emotional intelligence’ 1995 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=32 Helen Noble Sun, 7 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT So what can you do when you’re feeling besieged by life; by the demands of work and home life; when it starts to feel as if things are beyond your control? Take a break? If that’s a possibility, great! If not, what next? With the many and varied responsibilities we juggle; and the many guises in which we perform our differing duties, what is a viable option to leaving it all behind for a while? And is leaving it all behind for a while really such a satisfactory solution…? Will a radical shift in the nature and extent of your personal and/or professional responsibilities have magically occurred whilst you were away? How much of your holiday or break time was actually spent with you mulling over what could/should be happening at the office/business/at home? Or what you intend to do to improve things when you get back… You can take the body out of the working environment and place it somewhere comfortable, maybe warm and sunny; however the mind can still choose to reside in the dustiest files at the back of the filing cabinet. The urge to text your colleagues may be too compelling, even if the e-mail option has been well and truly excluded. So you find yourself somewhere new, exciting, maybe sipping some exotic cocktail – but your mind is wandering along the corridors of responsibilities; headed directly for that all too familiar door marked ‘urgent priorities’. This is how we are. Simply ‘switching off’ is not a realistic option for many of us. Even if we make a conscious effort to turn our mind to other things, the old, ingrained, routine thinking will rise to prominence at some point and reclaim our conscious attention. If we dissect the elements of the benefits of taking a break, we might conclude that what we really value and appreciate is the momentary release from the perceived constraints of our daily existence; the xistence that we create, to varying degrees, for ourselves. Apart from the obvious, non-negotiable time constraints such as office opening hours; public transport timetables; and nature of our duties or responsibilities, we have scope to fashion the style of our lives. Once we have grasped that concept and accepted the responsibility, then the balance of power has shifted in our favour. We can choose whether or not to incorporate the beneficial aspects of a holiday into our daily routine. Allowing ourselves just a moment’s peace and reflection in the midst of the mayhem, can serve to boost our inner levels of resilience. Breaking out from the time- honoured perspective in a situation can allow a whole new vantage point to become apparent, and new options to become available. Think of it as something akin to taking a gentle stroll in the fresh air and discovering beautiful new scenery. However, if this sounds rather idyllic and perhaps fanciful, and not anything that you are likely to engage with then it’s worth thinking about what it is that works for you. For a ‘scientific’ perspective on this notion of resilience it might be useful to consider it as the property of a material to absorb energy when it is elastically deflated, and then, upon up or re-loading to recover the previous level of energy. Essentially, resilience is the maximum energy per volume that can be stored. Acknowledging that the ‘yield’ stress is the point at which the plasticity of a material begins to deflate or deform; and that once the ‘yield’ point has been passed, then it is inevitable that some degree of the deformation will become permanent, hence precluding the capacity for re-inflation to previous levels. The obvious solution here is to ensure awareness of level of overload is carefully monitored and adjustments made when overload is a pending challenge or threat. Thinking of resilience from a socio-political perspective, it is interesting to note the creation of the Institute of Security and Resilience Studies at University College London, chaired by former cabinet minister John Reid. Here we see the concept of resilience being utilised as part of a government initiative to respond to natural disasters; international events; and acts of terrorism www.ukresilience.co.uk/ For a concise and useful reference as to how you can take practical steps to develop psychological resilience in your life, check out www.apahelpcenter.org/featuredtopics/feature.php?id=6-19k- http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=33 Helen Noble Mon, 1 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT And so the paradigm shifts; the picture is slipping out of it’s old familiar frame; and the old (financial) order is well and truly past its ‘sell by’ date. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for any economy stabilisation efforts, and can see that the rule of law and democracy still stand strong ... Indeed, one transcendent principle subsists, that which states ‘knowledge is power’. Knowledge, or at least the effective dissemination of it, will still allow you to accrue wealth, status and power. What has changed, is the nature of information that will be viewed as valuable. Take the recently toppled ivory tower of global finance, for example. How much information does the ‘average person’ now have about the workings of the stock markets? I, for one, have learned more jargon and developed more insight into the economic processes since the advent of the current ‘crisis’. I believe that institutions such as finance and law believe they profited from exclusivity; from being a minority in control of information which could benefit the majority. Indeed, psychologists have suggested that our brain has ‘evolved’ largely due the realisation that if we can know what someone else thinks they need, we can gain an advantageous position for ourself by ‘supplying’ it. However, this perspective taking skill can be significantly enhanced with even the most minute degree of empathy, and result in a whole new phenomena. Once the realisation dawns that we all, as humans, experience the same emotional and physical sensations (love and pain), our perceptions and decision making processes are irrevocably altered. This includes our choice to information share, Isn’t it obvious that the more insight and information that people have, the better informed their choices and the benefits for all become more apparent. You may be thinking ‘what about the people who choose to ‘mis-use’ the information? Well, I believe people generally act in such ways out of fear; and it’s fear of such behaviour that prompts people to limit information sharing. However, a lack of insight or information will never prevent someone from choosing to perform an anti-social or destructive act if they so choose. It’s just a lose-lose situation, a negative spiral of a misguided attempt to ‘control’ the actions of others. The use of emotions such as fear, guilt and shame to manipulate the actions of others is an outmoded model of social control, which has only resulted in the creation of greater levels of fear, guilt, shame and one of the most damaging and devastating emotional experiences - isolation. Anyway, any break –down or break- up, is always an opportunity for the creation of new connections; and with that comes new choices. We now have the opportunity to invest our money, and our energy in a positive way; to support people and organisations we can trust to create positive change in our world. Choose to invest wisely. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=34 Helen Noble Wed, 15 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT there’s a way. It’s true! The human will is more than just an abstract psychological construct. Farber (1966) has suggested that the important choices we make in life are not consciously experienced as choices, but can actually only be inferred after the event. This has been expanded upon* by use of the commonly held conception of the will in cognitive terms as a central executive system. If you adopt this approach, then you can view the ‘wilful’ process as responsible for the filtering, organizing and integration of the vast array of feelings, thoughts, desires, needs, goals and expectations that constitute our personalities and inform our life choices. However, due to the limitations of capacity of the conscious mind, the mind must surely, in part, operate on an unconscious level. Have you ever been asked ‘how’ you managed an ongoing responsibility; or achieved something great, against the natural odds for success? If so, it’s possible that you could not provide a full explanation. Perhaps, like me you felt the urge to explore the phenomenon a little further. PSI (personality systems interaction) theory** is an integrative framework that explains personality functioning in terms of the dynamic interplay between cognitive and affective mechanisms. It seeks to explain the nature of personality in terms of human creativity; intuition; sense of self; depression; and volitional action or wilful behaviour. This functional approach offers a precise scientific language for existential concepts such as will, self and intuition. Thus addressing Jung’s assertion that ‘ scientific knowledge…in the eyes of modern man, counts as the only intellectual and spiritual authority’*** this approach can be seen as useful to help overcome the discomfort of rationalist and scientists with the metaphysical models of experience and existence. Although far from a simple formula, the approach acknowledges the complexity of the workings of the human will; highlights the many ways in which healthy will may be frustrated; and seeks to help overcome the obstructive feelings of guilt, anxiety and alienation, without which we stand a much better chance of psychological growth. *Greenberg, Koole and Pyszczynski ‘Handbook of Experimental Existential Psychology’ ** Kuhl (2001) Motivation and personality: personality systems interactions *** Jung (1957) The undiscovered self. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=35 Helen Noble Sun, 5 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT The Legal Services Act, which received Royal Assent on 30th October 2007 and comes fully into force in 2012, reforms the way legal services in England and Wales are regulated and puts the consumer interest at the heart of the regulatory framework. The Act ushers in important opportunities for solicitors to team up with non-lawyers and to attract capital for their businesses in a carefully regulated environment. As a result, the framework of the regulation of legal services will change radically. Stephen Mayson, head of the Legal Policy Institute think tank set up to examine the implications of the Legal Services Act has recently argued in several prominent speeches that the legal services reforms are intended to bring about upheaval and reform in the legal services market and that the forces unleashed could be catalytic. Law firms will need to restructure and possibly refinance to consolidate, to recruit, train and promote sensibly, and to engage in even more sophisticated strategy and management. Mayson predicts that many law firms will be forced to consolidate or go out of business. Some have likened the fallout to the profession to the effects of the big bang on the universe itself…I wouldn’t go that far! Richard Susskind’s new book, ‘The End of Lawyers?’ (subtitled, Rethinking the Nature of Legal Services), points to a future in which the legal profession needs to undergo a significant transformation. According to the book the legal profession will need to react to two market forces: an irresistible pull towards ‘commoditisation’ of legal services; and the ongoing development and uptake of information technology which, it is envisaged, will become increasingly important for cutting costs and delivering legal services to the web generation of consumers. As with all changes, there will be those with the tendency to resist the (inevitable) situation, seeing it as an insurmountable problem; and those who will choose to view the changes as an opportunity and/or a challenge. There is always a choice. Even a choice to do nothing is still a choice. However, in this situation it seems like those who are resisting the changes are resisting the law itself… Have lawyers ever rebelled or revolted? I’ve never heard of a QC’s picket line... Perhaps it’s just the high street legal practitioners who think they are affected? Will the practitioners of the law just cease to function or are they willing (and able) to formulate a new function for success? Interesting times! http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=36 Helen Noble Tue, 16 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT A while back I read Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘The Tipping Point”. At the time it made perfect sense to me, I was able to see how apparently one small act could create a significant change, or shift in social or economic circumstances. It’s a theory that fits in well with my notion that that by taking responsibility for our own actions and lives we are able to bring about changes within the bigger picture; and in time to reframe the situation entirely. It is a useful, empowering concept, or tool, to use within the context of coaching; one that illustrates the significance of networking, of creating and maintaining constructive connections. So there I was trying to create a meaningful and motivating environmental policy for the fledgling legal practice, which is by design conservation conscious; wondering what contribution a local, office based, professional service which already prides itself on its recycling, energy conscious practices, can provide to make a notable difference…when again I stumbled across the term ‘tipping point’, but this time in the context of ecology. http://www.ecotippingpoints.org/ state that: ‘tipping points are levers for restoring sustainability to our imperilled environment. Small actions can make a big difference when they tap the inborn powers of nature and human societies to heal themselves.’ Also an article in the July/August edition of the Ecologist recently explained how: ‘Nature is dynamic. Nature is often non-linear. Nature is complex and interconnected. All of these features can create tipping points’. An example of the ‘runaway chain reaction’ is provided in the incidence of the spread of the virulent pathogen ‘chytrid fungus’ currently in the process of devastating the frog population. This epidemic can easily occur where there is tight coupling of elements in an ecological system. The emergence of an ‘abrupt threshold’ is an example of a non-linear tipping point. Take the collapse of the Atlantic Thermoline Circulation into consideration. The flow of this current is currently being adversely affected by the increase in global temperature, and as a result renders the possibility of Northern Europe becoming locked into a deep freeze at some time in the not- too distant- future. Then there is the interplay of the feedback loops, such as the Amazon rainforest. This natural wonder generates much of its own rainfall, as the dense vegetation quickly recycles moisture and returns it to the atmosphere. However, with the progression of deforestation, less water is vapour is recycled and the advent of cloud and rain declines; which in turn provides for a greater incidence of drought and forest fires. These global perceptions, coupled with local insight helped me to form a template, a basis on which the legal practice can make a difference with seemingly small contributions. We have recently secured a lease of land for a local charitable association who have now successfully reclaimed and regenerated some coastal land to create a natural, healthy, out door facility for local residents and tourists alike. This may just eventuate as a one- off project; or it could act as a catalyst for many more…causing a domino-like effect, raising awareness, highlighting a cause; and rousing others into action. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=37 Helen Noble Thu, 14 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT Last night I watched the last few minutes of TV programme investigating the phenomenon of chimerism. Essentially, this is ‘condition’ where the DNA of different humans or animals in the very early stage of development, merge to form one being. Therefore, it is possible therefore for different organs of the same body to develop from genetically distinct sources. This makes something of a nonsense of our concept of ourselves as discrete, boundaried beings. Although we are still each a unique collection of intelligence arranged in the format of blood, skin, muscle and bones, and we are generally able to trace our historical and cultural heritage; on a deeper and more immediate level we can now appreciate that we are more than the sum of our previously perceived ‘parts’. We may also consist of facets of people we have never met, who will never play any part in our life. This throws a much broader beam along the continuum of DNA research and application. How widely distributed amongst the population is this phenomenon? How accurate are DNA paternity tests? What about the role of DNA evidence in criminal investigations and trials? The outcome of both such situations for the individuals concerned could be radically different from the ‘truth’ of the scenario. People may live their lives in the mistaken belief that they have, or have not, been responsible for something; and others may forever wonder how such a ‘scientific’ result could ‘disprove’ the actuality of a situation. It could go some way to explain the diversity within families; and the diversity within individuals; why some fathers cannot accept ‘their’ children; and why some long-standing prisoners maintain a stance of innocence? So what about the psychological effect on people when this ‘new’ information about themselves surfaces? Surely most would experience an existential wobble at the thought that they are not who they have thought themselves to be all their lives? The psychological ‘sense of self’ is viewed as a strong component in our ability to function on an individual and integrate on a social or collective level. After the initial ‘shock’ perhaps we might be able to reflect on the situation and consider the news from different angles. As with all new perspectives, we can choose to resist changes or we can choose to pick out the positive elements and make them work for us. This must surely be the most useful way forward when we unearth some new information that we need somehow to make sense of before we can resolve the issues raised and continue on our way? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=38 Helen Noble Mon, 4 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT On first reading this might sound like a banal question, however the psychology behind the notion of ‘favourite’ people is rather more interesting. Recent research reported from Japan* required its participants to select persons whom they found attractive, with the aim of determining whether seeing a favourite person induces positive emotions; and if so, to analyse the psychological and physiological effects, if any, on the individual. The participants reported feeling positive emotions after watching footage of a favourite filmstar; and the ensuing chemical effects monitored in the body, suggests that there were positive influences the functioning of the immune system. The authors claim that this research serves to extend the ‘broaden and build’ theory of positive emotion** which asserts that positive emotions have a powerful energy to expand thinking and consequent action; therefore facilitating the building of personal resources, so boosting resilience, and psychological and physiological health and wellbeing. On the flip side of this issue, is the assertion that the pain of rejection by a loved one or being on the receiving end of an act of social exclusion is more than metaphorical. Brain imaging *** studies have revealed that the brain systems that are activated during such events include an element of physical pain. It is believed that we, as humans, experience the world from a very personal perspective and when reminded of this fact, the ensuing sense of isolation creates a desire to connect with others who we perceive as sharing our subjective experiences. This is termed ‘I sharing’ by an emergent sub-field of psychology, ‘experimental existential psychology’ or XXP****. This discipline believes that such existential concerns play a major role in the lives of most people; and yet are processed somewhere other than in our conscious awareness. In addition to the more traditional existential issues of awareness and fear of death, XXP has sought also to explore other issues in an attempt to shed new light on the human condition, including the phenomenon of personal identity. In XXP terms, the self is viewed as a multiplicity of identities, socially constructed, and with a thread or storyline allowing some sense of coherence throughout the duration of a life. It is also noted that we tend to take ourselves very seriously. Pyszczynski asserts that although taking ourselves less seriously could help us deal with some of the less desirable aspects of our experiences, we are contending with powerful psychological processes which are urging us to become important, significant and heroic. Others have argued that our existential concerns are integral to our (human) nature; and running away from them can cause a myriad of problems. And so contemporary existential thinking has it that confronting our existential angst can prove a source of strength, and assist with psychological growth and well-being. Perhaps this goes some way to explaining why, following the breakdown of a relationship or other personal or social disappointment, we sometimes enjoy a visit to the cinema with a group of like-minded friends, to view the inspirational exploits of an attractive hero/heroine ? *Matsunaga; Yamauchi; Nogimori; Konagaya; and Ohira, ‘Psychological and physiological responses accompanying positive emotions elicited on seeing favourite persons’ The Journal of Positive Psychology, Vol. 3, No 3, July 2008, 192 – 201. **Frederickson, B. L. (2004) ‘The broaden- and- build theory of positive emotions’. Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society of London. Series B, 359, 1367-1377 *** Eisenberger, N.A., Lieberman, M.D & Williams, K.D. (2003) ‘Does rejection hurt?’ Science, 302, 290-292 ****Greenberg, J., Koole, S. & Pyszczynski, T. [Eds] (2004) ‘Handbook of experimental existential psychology’. New York: Guilford Press. The Psychologist, vol. 21, no.7, July 2008 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=39 Helen Noble Sun, 6 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT The first commercially viable bionic arm, controlled by the thoughts of the individual to whom it is fitted, is currently featuring in UK news coverage. For you who were watching US or UK TV in the 1970s, the technology envisaged in the Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman, has now become something of a reality. Indeed the journey into artificial intelligence has proved an enduring one. In recent times, cognitive neuro-psychology has been ‘discovering’ that decision- making is not a purely intellectual endeavour. Now it is widely believed that both rational and emotional factors influence our decisions. Check out the endeavours of www.semaine-project.eu , a multi-million euro project which is seeking to develop emotion recognising computers. Essentially, the concept is to enable the machine to recognise signs of user frustration, boredom or tiredness, by reading your facial expression and responding accordingly… Imagine this, feeling somewhat jaded at the end of a work-heavy week, with the large project laid out in front of you still in need of much attention; and all you can think about is how you can get away from it all during the weekend; when you boot up your machine, as usual, and whilst waiting to click on an icon, a cheery voice chirps up with ‘Hi [Helen], how are you feeling today?’ And this is no pre-recorded gimmick. The voice is waiting for an answer. It’s poised to analyse the intonation in your voice; gauge the relative light or heaviness in your breath; and maybe even identify the slightest hint of sarcasm in your verbal response? What if there is no voice, just the silent scanning of the camera, searching out recognisable emotionally induced facial expressions, as contained within the tell-tale signs of every fold and crease? The project’s authors accord that the computer’s recognition of expression is only as good as the human information contained within the form of algorithms which allow the computer to ‘learn’ the combination of nuances which, in turn, denote ‘normal’ expressions of human emotions. However, humans are notoriously unsuccessful at reading expressions and other forms of body language, for example just consider the amount of research available into the unsuccessful detection of the incidence of lying…And what about the art of false smiling? With the computer be able to detect the deflecting act of putting on a brave face, and beseech the user to come clean with her true feelings? Will the machine be programmed to empathise; and will it ever challenge a stubborn or bored user? What about the user employed by a large corporation who ‘logs’ a high level of negative emotion. What might be his fate on audit? And as to the user who logs a complete lack of emotional response…? Will displays of excessive, inappropriate emotions constitute a breach of the terms of employment? Maybe there will be a test case or two, where the issues of constructive dismissal or the (employer) dreaded discrimination legislation may be put to the ‘test’ in relation to emotional conditions or behaviour? Perhaps the gathered data will form the basis for a longitudinal study into the emotional life of the workforce? Let’s hope it takes account of the fact that higher (than expected) levels of paranoia have been identified in the general public; and that when being watched we tend to behave differently than when we think we are unobserved. How long until we routinely attach electrodes to measure our pulse and sensors to measure bodily secretions? Ok, that might be going too far but, really, can there ever be a true (artificially constructed) reflection of the nature of human emotion? And are we headed towards the attempted creation of artificial emotion? Hmm, smacks somewhat of the Stepford Workplace template to me… What are your thoughts? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=40 Helen Noble Tue, 10 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT Look back on your life and the chances are that the things you are good at and enjoy, and the things that you have succeeded at, are one and the same. So why should this come as any surprise? Perhaps that we have been taught to value things other than our innate abilities…or others may have not (yet) recognised our skills and abilities and so we are not sure of them either? It may be that we measure our successes by the standards of others. If so, we are employing a falsely-premised referencing mechanism. The thing is no-one else can know all of the relevant details of our existence and subjective experiences to be in a position to provide a full in-depth and accurate analysis. Some may be able to pitch quite startlingly apt suggestions at us, but really only we have access to the myriad of folders of our memories of thoughts, feelings, images and ideas which make us the unique creatures that we are. That information only becomes known to others if we choose to reveal it though words, pictures, sounds or actions; and/or if we are both highly unaware of, and demonstrative with, our non- verbal communications. The thing is, we create our own memories, by taking all the information available and constructing it in a way that we like, that makes ‘sense’ to us, that suits us! In doing so we write our own story. If we accept that we tend to define others in our lives by the nature of their actions (friends who we eat and drink with; employers/employees/colleagues with whom we discuss work/career issues; peoples of other cultures whose practices of which we have no experience or understanding); and in the process infer that they perform in a certain way because they think or feel a certain way, for example 'she refuses to answer my calls because she's selfish, all wrapped up in herself'; rather than 'she's not returned my calls because she is busy, having many tasks to attend to'; it is useful to consider that in comparison, we tend to define ourselves, and our own existence in terms of external events, such as the demands of our ‘job’; family commitments; our geographical location; current bank balance and such like…. Then, for our story to be more accurately representative of the form of ourselves, it needs also to be written in terms of our own beliefs, thoughts and feelings. After all, these are the agent provocateurs which actually form who we really are, (in terms of ego) and thus how we behave accordingly. On a human level, we can choose the words we use; the images we wish to convey to others ; and the emotions we wish both to feel ourselves and to invoke in others. And as we tend to store somewhat rose tinted memories and have limited ability to predict how we will feel in the 'future'; then an honest appraisal of what we are thinking and how we are feeling right now is a good place to start. And so, with this power, why create a story of anything other than shining success? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=41 Helen Noble Wed, 4 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT I have been mulling and musing over the concept of momentum lately. It all started when I was exerting myself on the cross trainer and could feel the extra energy ‘around’ me; the force that kept moving me forwards at a seemingly similar pace, even when I put in less effort. According to the laws of physics, P=MV. That is where P is the momentum; M is the mass; and V the velocity. Momentum can be defined as "mass in motion." All objects have mass; so if an object is moving, then it has momentum - it has its mass in motion. The amount of momentum which an object has is dependent upon two variables: how much ‘stuff’ is moving and how fast that ‘stuff’ is moving. So as expressed as above, in terms of an equation, the momentum of an object is equal to the mass of the object times the velocity of the object. Thus, if I wanted to quantify the value of the energy I (or the mass that is ‘me’ ) was producing, or contributing to the production of, I could apply this formula. However, not being too concerned with producing a definitive measure (as if there is ever such a thing?) I started to think more about the theme of energy in general. When approached on my doorstep by two ladies from a local church with strong views about God, human behaviour and the nature of the ‘afterlife’; I found myself once again reducing things to the conceptual level of energy. One of the fundamental tenets of physics is that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transformed from one state to another. So how can we ‘die’? What would happen to our energy, the stuff that’s been facilitating our existence, if we suddenly just failed to subsist? Well there seem to be at least three options… • Energy will dissipate from an area of higher energy to one of lower energy, without the input of additional energy. Think about how the hot tea in your mug soon ‘warms up’ the porcelain you have your hands wrapped around; how the colour from a new piece of red clothing tints your favourite white shirt a uniform pink! So is this an explanation of how our human warmth, mood and expression can directly affect the feelings and therefore the actions of others? • For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This means that as I push the footplate and handles on the cross trainer, during the very act of pushing or exertion, I will also experience being ‘pushed back’. This is the principle at work behind the propulsion of jet planes and rockets, which expel gases in the opposite direction, and are themselves pushed forward in the process. Therefore it would seem that energetic explosions are, in essence, cyclical and reciprocal. Thus if you instigate a change, something will undoubtedly and noticeably occur within your sphere of influence. • The traditional laws of the conservation of energy and of mass state that these phenomena are intimately intertwined and state that, under normal conditions, the total energy of a contained system and the total mass of that contained system will remain constant. However, fairly recently, though observations of a minute loss of total mass in a closed system have been noted, and this has been attributed to the fact that the mass itself had actually changed into energy. This has led to a modification of the laws, which now assert the provision that mass and energy can actually change into each other. So how to translate or interpret this? It serves as a nice reassurance that whilst on the cross trainer I might well be able to burn unwanted fat! But how about the transformation of energy into mass or matter? The transformational power of thought, maybe? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=42 Helen Noble Wed, 28 May 2008 00:00:00 GMT So we have developed the cognitive ability to think about the future; to make plans for what or how (inaccurately) we think we want our futures to be; but there are huge glitches in the system; so many errors of understanding; flawed assumptions. Imagination cannot easily transcend the boundaries of the present and project into the future, as we need to use our skills of perception, which are deeply rooted in the present! As is our tendency to judge the actions of other people in the past, by own current thinking and principles, as opposed to how we might have been thinking at that time. Think of George Orwell’s 1984, and how life actually transpired during that year; and ask yourself, is our 2010 about to resemble A Space Odyssey? Yet we have this desire to know and to some extent control what happens in the future. We have developed a considerable array of tools in order to help us achieve this; ranging from psychological personality assessments designed to identify current trends and therefore predict future personal choices; astrological charts to provide a map the influence of the energy of transiting planets on our daily lives; scientific, medical research to enable us to treat and eradicate the occurrence and/or proliferation of bacterial and/or viral infections which we consider a threat to the survival of our species. Predictions about the future are made in the present, they are inevitably influenced by the present, for example a declaration of undying love on your wedding may be heartfelt, however, it will be the feelings and thoughts you are experiencing at a later date, for example perhaps when consulting a divorce lawyer, which determine how you act at that point in the proceedings; and certainly not the way you felt on your wedding day. If we routinely and mistakenly attribute feelings, perhaps failing to feel good about an imaginary future as we are busy feeling bad about a current event, and so we mistakenly conclude that we will feel tomorrow as we feel today, ‘ Ill never finish this project on time’, or forever procrastinating in the belief that ‘I’ll do it tomorrow’; ‘my new exercise regime will start on the weekend’; or I’ll go on a diet after the holiday’, in the genuine belief that we will feel more motivated or energised at some point in the future. Is this then a situation of continuing conflict between reality-induced feelings and imagination- induced feelings… a fulcrum at which we uncontrollably pivot? Bernoulli’s theory that what we objectively achieve (e.g. wealth) is not the same as what we subjectively experience when we get it (increased freedom, choices etc); and so the wisdom of any decision could be calculated by multiplying the ‘probability’ that the decision will give us what we want, by the ‘utility’ of getting what we want. In essence, Bernoulli might be interpreted as asserting that when presented with the hundredth red rose, we will not experience the same amount of pleasure as when we initially received the first (of what would we could not know would amount to a hundred) bloom(s). As human behaviour can be largely regarded as habitual, Gilbert suggests that we become immune to the big picture constantly surrounding us, continually adapting and finding that the uniqueness lessens and as such the overall situation becomes less pleasurable for us (think of the disparity in pleasure experienced on receipt of the hundredth rose, in comparison with the joy of the novel or spontaneous situation of the initial rose received). This desensitization to the bigger picture could also go some way to explaining why the catastrophizing approach to global warming issues does not alarm most people into serious preventative action? Gilbert* posits that as we currently stand in the company of six billion or so other interconnected individual humans, we could use the experiences of others to help us to make more accurate and rewarding choices for our futures. Although we tend to define ourselves in terms of differences between us and others, we are in effect, at least as much like others as we are different from them. He suggests that if we want to predict how we will feel about something tomorrow, we could do worse than seek out someone to whom the same thing is happening today and ask them how/what they feel about it. And as we actively seek out the company of people who we regard as much like ourselves, then we have already narrowed the margin of error. He concludes that it is only by endeavouring to understand how things are, how they work, that we can ever hope to achieve greater success in creating a desirable future for ourselves. In looking for explanations, which if found, serve to reduce the emotional impact of an event, we are thus able to tuck them away into satisfactory categories for storage; and in doing so… we can free ourselves up - to progress on to the next conundrum? *’Stumbling on Happiness’, 2007 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=43 Helen Noble Sun, 4 May 2008 00:00:00 GMT You’ve probably heard them all, how to: ‘create your own reality/ make manifest your dreams/harness the power of intention/ make thoughts become things’; Albert Einstein is widely quoted as believing that ‘Imagination is more important than knowledge’; and more recently the human brain has been described as an ‘anticipation machine’ * So, how did we, as humans learn to preview in our imaginations, events and occurrences which have not yet come to pass? Development of the frontal lobe of the human brain is believed to have occurred sometime in the last 3 million years, forming what we now recognise as our modern, 3 pound brains. The frontal lobe enables human adults with the capacity to consider their own (and others’) extended existence through time. Those without effectively functioning frontal lobes sometimes appear to be living in a permanent state of ‘the present’. Damage to the frontal lobes whether through surgery (in the form of a lobotomy to reduce the incidence of anxiety and depression) or injury, is often seen to interfere with the individual’s ability to plan, or project into the future. However, adults with healthy lobes have, in effect, a ‘time machine’; the ability to ‘journey’ into the future and anticipate how things might look and feel. In contrast, small children cannot say what they want to be when they grow up, or rush themselves when told they are ‘going to be late’, because they have no understanding of the concept of ‘later’. How frustrated I remember feeling when requesting something like a weekend visit to the beach, to receive the habitual adult response of ‘we’ll see!’ ‘We’ll see what? And when?” This was a most unsatisfactory answer to my question or suggestion, although no doubt my parents believed they had successfully and non-committingly dealt with the matter! However, at some point we learn the concept of ‘later’ and start behaving as if we can determine the future events of our lives, by planning and arranging a rosy scenario for ourselves, and sometimes others. Harvard Professor of psychology, Ram Dass, in his classic 1970s text ‘Be Here Now’, states his belief that the key to happiness is to stop thinking about the future, which is primarily achieved by the practice of meditation. Why then does this pose such a challenge? Why does it take years of practice for us to be able to meditate effectively, and how can we ever measure our progress? Daniel Gilbert** asserts that in doing so we are, in effect, battling the very nature of our own highly evolved, frontal lobe functioning. The act of thinking about the future is a source of pleasure. It gives us a sense of control, so assuaging our sense of self-efficacy, which in turn increases our level of happiness. Also Gilbert posits that our fear and anxiety- fuelled thoughts serve to help steer us away from bad choices. So why is it that when we realise that we are in the midst of a happy projection, one we made earlier and stored on the shelf, so to speak, until the time is right, it always feels very different from how we recall imagining it would be? Perhaps you remember the post -exam euphoria you had anticipated following your university ‘finals’, which actually turned out to be just another evening in the regular student haunt, watching the usual suspects drinking too much before dropping their trousers to flash a ‘moonie’…or the birth of your first child, the magic of which quickly dissipates, dropping you onto a treadmill -like routine of changing nappies and preparing of midnight feeds, in-between snatched moments of precious sleep; or that first day of that new job, wearing that new suit, embodying all the empowering status associated with the corporate position, which actually left you feeling over-awed and under -qualified? So how does this mismatch occur…this hiatus between what we imagine and what actually eventuates? Well, the unreliability or fallibility of memory is well documented and now the concept of ‘faulty’ thinking is being applied to the function of imagination. For example, if our memory of feeling happy about something in the past is unreliable in relation to its accuracy, how can we adequately compare our present, let alone our future state of happiness? We all perceive and remember and therefore project our experiences in unique ways. When we attempt to evaluate the apparent experiences of another (for example fame, beauty, success, wealth, famine, tragedy, destitution) we are indulging in an essentially faulty thought process. However their state of experience may appear to us, we have no real concept of how it actually feels for them. Accordingly, when we project ourselves into their ‘shoes’, or seek to import elements of their life into our future existence, in the mistaken belief that those or similar circumstances will make us happy, we are comparing subjective states, filling in the gaps in our knowledge with our fantasies, and therefore can only succeed in drawing faulty conclusions. This is the undoubted result of our human psychological process that ‘combines what our eyes see with what we already think, feel, know, want and believe.*** However, although our brains fill in the gaps with whatever is already encoded in our memory, it appears to ignore other crucial information. For example, as an undergraduate I researched the ‘fear of crime’ for a criminology module. What I discovered was that the least likely’ type of’ person to become the victim of a crime such as personal assault and/or robbery, was an elderly lady living alone. However, when this statistically rare occurrence receives major press coverage, the general public are left with the impression that there is a much greater risk of this type of occurrence and so our ‘fear’ becomes disproportionate to the risk of the event. Gilbert** also asserts that when we consider the distant past or the distant future we tend to express our thoughts in abstract terms, and seek to present them in terms of ‘why’ they occurred or will occur; whereas when dealing with the near past of future, our thinking is more detailed and concrete, expressed more in terms of ‘how’ things happened or are about to happen. Thus it appears that our ability to focus on the ‘now’ is much more detailed and accurate than our ability to project into the past or future. Hmm. More on this to follow, later… *Dennett, D ‘Kinds of Minds’, 1996 **’Stumbling on Happiness’, 2007 ***Kant, I ‘Critique of Pure Reason’ 1781 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=44 Helen Noble Tue, 22 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT Unless you are ultimately financially ‘independent’; or choose not to invest any interest in financial affairs, the looming ‘fear’ of the US ‘credit crunch’ will probably have featured in your thoughts recently. Recent UK news coverage has included reports of the reduction in availability of mortgage products available for prospective property owners, and the word is that, following the lead of the US, the UK property market is facing a severe slump. Economies are essentially cyclical in nature – subject to the processes of expansion and contraction. I remember the last major contraction in the UK property market, it occurred in the early/mid 1990s, when interest rates soared to 15.9%. As a property owner facing increased repayments and a subsequent situation of negative equity at that time, I now find myself some 15 years later still afloat, apparently more financially able and stable, yet still remaining subject to potential economic fluctuations. I have no expertise in economics qualifying me to offer financial advice here, but as with any challenge, (threat, fear, opportunity – however you wish to frame it) I can assert that the only control you can ever hope to exert is on internal, as opposed to external events. Fear is paralysing. The fear of something is also often greater than the effects or consequences of the fearful ‘thing’ itself. If everyone chose to become paralysed by their own sense of fear then surely the consequence would be a societal/economic breakdown? Without doubt, some people will respond with fear and paralysis or other defence mechanisms; others will adopt a philosophical stance; and many will invest in a pragmatic approach. Perhaps the most useful approach in money-relating matters is pragmatic – doing what can be clearly seen to be needed, when it is/will be most effective. For example, if a source of finance or work should dry up, then time and energy might be best spent by out- sourcing, or exploring other potential options, as opposed to bemoaning the current state of affairs. Openness to unexpected opportunities can be optimised at this time. Steps, which may at first appear to be backwards or sideways orientated, might actually prove to be the first steps along whole new avenues of developments. In a climate where availability is limited, it might pay to increasingly avail of yourself. Adopting a flexible approach to your own role and abilities you will open yourself up to greater opportunities; others may view you differently; and you may gain greater prominence in what is usually a saturated market place. Accept that change is needed and embrace the opportunities that come your way. If you are prepared to alter your pace and slip into the contemporary momentum, the ride might prove more fluid and fortuitous for you. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=45 Helen Noble Fri, 4 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT Often find yourself on the fringes; on the edge of the unknown; treading a path where the next step isn’t clear…but you somehow know where you have to go/ what you have to do? Perhaps you can (un)usually always see ‘both’ sides of the current story; or recognise multi- faceted dimensions to the picture that no- one else appears to have considered? Maybe you identify strongly with more than one culture, speak a variety of languages; have a range of diverse interest/talents; a few unpredictable career changes detailed on your CV; and generally feel like you don’t belong or fit in snugly to just one place. And yet you are highly successful, an achiever of great things. If so, you could be one amongst the fastest growing and most influential demographic group in Europe and the US, one of ‘The Cultural Creatives’ of our time*. The ‘edge’ has been defined as a position at which choices are created and decisions are made. This is the territory where the familiar and the unknown unceremoniously meet, where openness facilitates and vital learning occurs. By nature this is not a comfortable place, but something akin to the edge of black hole – where from an apparent totality of nothingness, new ideas appear to magically become manifest. Successful edgewalkers are characterised by their trust in their vision and their optimistic belief in success. People who continue to pull new ideas out the hat can be likened to the positive electrons which appear at the edge of a black hole, those that float away from the point of creation and grow or morph into bigger things. Interestingly, it is the negative electrons which ‘fall back’ into the hole, so serving to increase its density and ultimately contribute to the inevitable atomic explosion that occurs. However, having escaped the ‘black hole’, many entrepreneurs; agents of social or cultural change, scientists, often face the paradigm police. These ‘pioneers’ often risk their reputations and economic positions on what appears to be an non-rational proposition, one that does not appear to be ‘measurable’ by way of current statistical frameworks, and is therefore treated with suspicion and viewed as best kept ‘in check’. The nature of the risk is that the walker will ‘fall over the edge’, taking their idea(s) with them. Thus survival depends on the skill of balancing the new with the existing; of keeping the passion for the new alive whilst remaining effective, albeit in a somewhat detached from, in the current (professional) existence. It’s about viewing roles and responsibilities as ‘bridge building’ between the established and the new; as facilitating the flourishing of ideas without becoming embedded in their detail or practical application. Something like keeping your eye on the goal/prize/intended outcome whilst also watching how the rest of the team are playing and seeing where you can best intervene to assist the achievement along its intended direction. Sound like you? www.edgewalkers.org http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=46 Helen Noble Wed, 5 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT Much has been written about the social and psychological differences between ‘generations’ of individuals. I once read somewhere the assertion that people resemble their ‘times’, to a greater extent than they resemble their parents. Also, that social and/or cultural conflicts can be attributed to generation ‘gaps’. The current generation ‘Y ‘ category that comprises the young adults amongst us (18 to 30’s ish), amounts to some 20% of the population. Also known as the ‘echo boomers’ or ‘millenials’, this section of contemporary society has been subject to much speculation and some psychological research, appearing to emanate largely from the business and marketing sectors. Generation Y employees are generally said to be: • Highly independent and financially savvy due to childhood experience in dual income or one parent families. • Racially and ethnical diverse to the point that the category of ‘minority’ holds no meaning or relevance for them. • Personally empowered due to an over- indulgent parenting style designed to promote high levels of self –esteem and optimistic outlooks. They are believed to be highly influenced by, and dependent on, the constant stream of technological advances, which they embrace fully in all aspects of their life. Popular stereotypical images include the 20something listening to his ipod whilst talking to/texting someone on his mobile phone and surfing the internet for free music downloads whilst sitting in casual attire at his workstation… or something like that. Essentially, it is asserted that today’s 20somethings are not seeing themselves as constrained by the career climb of us preceding generation ‘X’ ers. They choose to view work as one woven aspect of their life, not as a separate entity. It has been suggested that Y’ers see their lives more as a journey with themselves in the driving seat, able to switch routes without viewing their path as ‘disjointed’ in any way. The recognition of the flexibility and drive for high standards of this generation of ‘workers’ has been tempered with observations that in the pursuit of excellence, Y’ers are characteristically more aggressive, impulsive and narcissistic. So, in the hope of gaining some further insight into this , I conducted some small scale, home spun, phenomenological research consisting solely of self report, based on a semi structured interview conducted with the Y’ers currently living at home with me. I sought to address the broad themes outlined above and found that: • On-going education is viewed as a vehicle to greater earning opportunities and high financial reward is equated with investment in education. • Working for oneself, on a full time basis of about 40 hours per week, is considered a likelihood. • Doing something not classed as enjoyable is not considered as a work option. • Staying in one job is viewed as necessary to achieve a specific goal. • Using state of the art technology for work purposes is a given. • Leisure time at evenings and weekends is highly valued. • Constant performance/achievement feedback is viewed as a necessary part of higher education and the training/work experience. • Good relationships, both personal and those encountered in a work setting, are valued. • Assertiveness and having a positive attitude are valued as personal skills to help achieve success in all areas of life. • Branding confers a degree of certainty – as in ‘straight away someone knows what they’re dealing with’ It seems as if the ‘Y’ers have a strong picture of what they desire and expect from the education system and the fast approaching world of work. Personally, I can identify major differences in the attitudes and experiences of the ‘Y’ers, and me and my ‘X’ generation contemporaries. And I have to say that I see much healthy positivity in the outlook of the ‘Y’ers . It would be good to see this translated into a generally more relaxing and rewarding lifestyle, from which the ‘Z’ generation can springboard into the future. www.csmonitor.com www.rainmakerthinking.com http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=47 Helen Noble Sun, 17 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT In my opinion, psychology is a relatively ‘new’ science; and a relatively ‘newer’ profession. It has strived for acceptance as a ‘science’, rather than just to be viewed as ‘common sense’, by developing theories; evidenced through experimental studies and published by way of articles. In very basic terms, the role of science is to provide explanations and develop understanding of phenomena and having done so, formulate effective interventions in an endeavour to produce desirable change and advance scientific ‘progress’. In a professional sense, the practice of psychology is subject to a supervisory body (the British Psychological Society, or BPS in the UK) with a code of ethics, and soon to be regulated by a statutory body, the Health Professions Council. To qualify as a graduate member of the BPS you have to obtain an accredited psychology degree (Bsc); and to obtain Chartership status you have to pursue a higher degree (Msc, Phd) and training in a specific field. To maintain your professional role you then have to continue with further training/studies, known as Continuing Professional Development; and to receive ‘supervision’ from someone more qualified/experienced than you in your particular field. All well and good. Professional standards are crucial for credibility and client care. However, as the BPS themselves state, psychology is the ‘scientific study of people, the mind and behaviour’. And although it is important to enable people to research, investigate and develop expertise, from which others may benefit , I’m presently looking at the situation from a different angle. How important is for people generally to have access to this ‘specialist’ information? Information on health issues such as the importance of a healthy diet; the need for regular exercise; the benefits of giving up smoking and the need to prevent infection through the adoption of personal hygiene practices, proliferate in the popular press, TV advertisements offering assistance for those wishing to cease smoking; and through government incentives, such as the healthy eating policies in school. Commercially produced educational information and entertainment for children now often contains useful psychological tools and practices. This is all good stuff, and the fact it is so easily accessible to all now, will hopefully result in people developing healthier habits and so generally enjoy better health and development. All these aspects of our existence have a sound, scientific knowledge base and are now being widely disseminated for the benefit of all. So what about our sound knowledge base of human emotional health? I’m not talking about the extreme psychiatric or psychological conditions which have been the subject of much research over the years. This is about our day to day psychological functioning, which for the vast majority of us tends to stay mostly within the boundaries of what is regarded as ‘normal’ on the continuum of human experience and behaviour. However, within this ‘norm’, people widely report experiencing such conditions as anxiety; mild depression; general emotional management issues (such as road rage); insomnia; low levels of confidence and/ or of motivation. These are aspects of ourselves which can serve to determine our general happiness and satisfaction with life. These issues are also the subject of much research and current knowledge. However, these issues are still widely regarded as the domain of clinical psychology, which approaches them by applying the ‘dysfunctional’ model of diagnosis, analysis and treatment. I believe if people had more access to this information, presented in a general and applicable way, then something like the intention that Andy Warhol wished to achieve with his art movement of the 1950s, could be achieved with contemporary, relevant psychological insight. Warhol wanted more than an elite few to experience and enjoy the phenomena of art. By creating his (now infamous ) pictures of coke tins and cans of soup, he was trying to inform people that we all have similar experiences, regardless of how educated or rich we are (or not!). When people perceive stuff as relevant to them, they tend to consider it more carefully and value it more highly. Surely to allow people to more openly experience some of the psychological knowledge and know-how previously held within the domain of ‘expert knowledge’ could only serve to improve the range of choices that people perceive; and result in more informed decisions/behaviour. The role of low self-esteem in eating disorders is now a commonly accepted factor. People now freely state that as part of the reason for their past difficulties. However, when it comes to other individual and social ‘problems’ emotional issues are still largely left undercover. Of course, the arguments against popularism tend to focus on the ‘deskilling’ nature of the process. Many a fine art critic has been know to assert that Pop and more recent forms of art are created by people who do not possess the skill necessary to produce a piece of what would be classified as ‘fine art’. However, there is a difference in sharing psychological knowledge and practicing when unqualified to do so. Although there are moves to bring more psychological knowledge to society in general, such as Richard Wiseman’s sole academic Chair in the Public Understanding of Psychology, in my personal view, bringing more contemporary, relevant knowledge into the public domain can only be a positive move. The sooner that concepts such as resilience become embedded in the popular culture, the better for everyone, as far as I am concerned. When people feel able to freely seek advice on their anxieties, along with other ‘physical’ health issues, then they will be better informed to make the necessary changes to improve their lives and the lives of those around them. Rather than fearing our own shadow (s) we might begin to acknowledge, recognise and integrate them. And from the professional standpoint, when psychological knowledge becomes embedded in the popular culture, surely it’s postion as an accepted scientific practice will be more widely established? The Philosophy of Andy Warhol (From A to B and Back Again) 1975 www.richardwiseman.com http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=48 Helen Noble Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT The way I see it, there are three types of New Year’s resolutions, 1. The desire, or a vague idea to change something in some way 2. The decision to break a habit or change old behaviour 3. The intention to create a new habit or develop a new skill Vague resolutions such as to ‘be more healthy’, ‘take more exercise’, ‘lose weight’, or ‘get a better job’ need to be given the smart treatment. If they are ever going to progress past the wistful stage, they need to be: S pecific M easurable A achievable (or agreed, if planned in conjunction with someone else) R ealistic T ime bound For example, if wanting to lose weight or change your body shape, firstly ask yourself WHY? This will help you to clarify and strengthen your intention in your own mind. When you are clear about what you want, others are more likely to be able and inclined to help you. Specify HOW you intend to make the desired changes. For example, you may decide that you need to change your eating habits and exercise routine. Ask yourself how much weight do I want to want to lose or WHAT size or shape am I aiming for? This is important as we gain greater motivation for change when we can see that we already have, or are making progress towards our goal(s). Be real about it. Set yourself too unrealistic a target and you are just setting yourself up to fail. That’s not a useful loop to set yourself up in. Given the variables of time; resources; and current level of ability, set yourself an achievable goal. Ask yourself, could most people achieve this? If the answer is yes, then, in the absence of some rare idiosyncratic variable, then so can you. Decide WHEN you are going to take the necessary action and WHERE you can find support and resources. Ask yourself WHO can help you, and take any assistance or advice that is offered. The more information you have available to you, the more informed will be your choices and the greater your chances of success. When trying to break a habit, I have found it most useful to replace the said behaviour and accompanying/supporting behaviours with another activity. It is important to acknowledge the other habits that might support the main behaviour, as they provide you with more opportunities to intervene. For example, if you routinely smoke at certain times, rearrange your schedule so you no longer have that time available; if you tend to eat unhealthy foods at certain places, choose an alternative place to eat; and if you engage in particular activities (that you now wish to avoid) with certain other individuals, avoid being in their company. The changes do not have to be dramatic or absolute, just one small change, such as doing something different one evening a week can help to break down the old routine and kick start the build up of a new pattern of behaviour. Basically, take responsibility for where you go, and what you do with whom. You created the habit, or recurring situation and you can now create something different. Allow yourself alternative choices; and actively create new opportunities for yourself. This in itself, can then become a new habit. If trying to establish a new habit be realistic about your existing ability, time for practice, current schedule of responsibilities, available resources to discern what and how you can expect to progress in what time. For example if you wish to develop your yoga practice, · Decide which stage you are already at, and where you would like to be at · Work out how much time you can devote to the practice and the time/days that are most convenient for you to practice. · Some people find that scheduled classes are more motivating, in that a new social support networking opportunity is created. If that’s you, check out the classes in your area. · If you prefer to practice in private or at a time when classes are not scheduled, source a variety of DVDs and plan a month’s schedule for yourself, in advance. When trying to make or break a habit, it is effective to recall a time when you have managed to achieve a goal and reflect on how you managed it. What steps did you take? Which aspects of the process were you good at? Humans are notoriously unsuccessful at transferring the skills we use in one situation to another, especially problem solving. However, once aware of our strengths it is possible to apply them in what appear at first to be a very different scenarios. Remember, the change starts NOW and is a current, on-going process. If you’re not practising your change of routine, you’re practising the old, well- rehearsed routine… again! And, as practice improves performance, new practices need constant attention. Keep your intentions and actions live in your attention and they will strengthen and become more comfortable. Lose your concentration and you will automatically default to the old settings and habits. This may sound an exhausting process, but if you try it you will be pleasantly surprised. Resisting things always takes more effort and energy than simple awareness and focus. For a timely reminder of the psychological stages of change we progress through, check out the previous blog of 7th January 2007, titled ‘Are you ready?’ If you feel yourself being enticed away from your new behaviour or are close to relapsing into your old habit, remember the first step is your thought to do so. It’s at that thought stage that you need to intervene. Identify the first thought that leads down the road towards your old habit, and you can switch routes at that earliest stage. However, intervention at the action stage is still possible. For example, if you reach for that cigarette or drink, it is always possible to intervene as soon as you are aware of what you are doing and correct your choice of actions. Remember at all times and in all situations you have the choice, The choice to stay or to leave The choice to continue or to desist The choice to change It is crucially important to reward your own efforts No-one else can know (or appreciate) the full extent of your efforts, so you are best placed to support and encourage yourself, in whatever way(s) work(s) for you. And finally, if you have the tendency to be hard on yourself, especially in scenarios of perceived failure, remember that people effectively shut down when treated in a negative manner whereas we thrive on positivity. Be generous with your positivity, then sit back and witness the growth of well-being and prosperity inside, outside and around you. View creating change as a cycle within the great cycle, circle or sphere of existence; and choose a clear, bright creation to reflect the change in you. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=49 Helen Noble Thu, 27 Dec 2007 00:00:00 GMT I wonder if everyone in the Northen Hemisphere feels like slowing down this time of year, working less and resting more? Probably not everyone; but possibly quite a few. Is it about the shorter days and colder weather? I would reason so. So, it’s instinctual behaviour? Perhaps a response to the environment? I would say so. So what about it being the end of the year? Well that’s a psychological construct. A man- made demarcation of the passage of time. It’s not really the end of anything, and it would follow that the New Year is not really the beginning of anything, either! So why do we choose to see it as such? It’s how we make sense of things. The human brain is a self-organising system and in the absence of external prompts, which we can choose to adopt or ignore, we tend to create our own rituals. These are practices which help us to make sense of our experiences, both in the form of individual habits and collective practices, such as organised religions. Give me an example. Ok. At the end of each calendar ‘year’ I have developed the individual ritual of reflecting on all of the achievements/positive events which have affected me personally, and the lives of those with who I am closely associated. I choose to represent these as steps, or perhaps more poetically, I visualise myself walking to the sea’s edge and then turning around to admire the tracks, patterns and loops made by the footprints in the golden expanse of sand on a beach. When I’m happy with that, I start the ‘New Year’ on some fresh sand, always knowing that when I stop to look back I will have left an irrefutable trail. The only unknown here is where I will choose to make that first imprint… http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=50 Helen Noble Tue, 11 Dec 2007 00:00:00 GMT The time for change is now. You cannot change what has been; or what is yet to come to pass. However, you can now change how things are (for you, and others). Behaviourist psychologist Meichenbaum developed a system of ‘cognitive behaviour modification’ around the discovery that people talk to themselves; and Dowd* has asserted that ‘all human activities and emotions are mediated by cognitive activities – such as thinking interpretive errors, self-statements, irrational thoughts; and personally unique, idiosyncratic meanings we often use to explain phenomena’. Cognitive hypnotherapist Dowd believes that ‘humans are meaning makers and will assign their own idiosyncratic meanings to events if none are obvious’. These meanings are constructed from both explicit knowledge and tacit -or our ‘unconscious’ knowledge, if explained in Freudian terms. Tolle** states that ‘the mind is a superb instrument if used rightly’; and that ‘the moment you start watching the thinker, [that is you as expressed in the form of your thoughts] a higher level of consciousness becomes activated.’ Tolle recommends that we listen to the inner voice(s), impartially – without judgement or condemnation. Then we will become aware of ourselves as objective, independent witnesses to our own thoughts. He asserts that our concept of time, both past and future, is merely a psychological construct which serves to distract us from functioning fully in the present. We can ruminate and so remain 'stuck' in the past; or we can put our lives on hold until some magical time in the future when all will be well. He believes that to effect change we must acknowledge that we only ever have such opportunity in the ‘present moment’. *E Thomas Dowd ‘Cognitive Hypnotherapy’ (2000) **Eckhart Tolle ‘The power of Now’ (2005) http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=51 Helen Noble Sun, 11 Nov 2007 00:00:00 GMT If someone told you that you could have everything exactly as you want it, in all aspects of your life as long as you could paint a clear, accurate picture, incorporating symbols of everything that you want or think you need, how much effort would you put into it? Would you trip yourself up at the outset by saying ‘I can’t paint?’ Maybe your way would be to take yourself off to research the whole history of art and artists in order to gather all the information you need to know to create a picture of your own? Perhaps you would sign up for art classes, telling yourself that when you are highly skilled at watercolours, oil on canvas or line drawing you will start work on your personal masterpiece? It could be that you are already adept with the paintbrush but are presently toying with different styles and not exactly sure of your genre? And what about other people? Would they understand where you were coming from? Would they like your work? What if someone was offended by your picture and refused to speak to you ever again? Then, of course, there’s the possibility that you would be letting everyone who looked at the picture into some of your most closely held secrets… I’m sure there are also many additional reasons why the painting, once completed, might never see the light of day. Of course, there are a myriad of ways to create the life you want to lead, and just as many ways, reasons, excuses we can employ to avoid the responsibility for the creation. You actively choose where and how you live; you choose who shares your life; and how you make your money and spend your time. We all use symbols to create meaning, for example, words are symbols of communication that we use to express ourselves and create a meaningful existence in the form of relationships with others. Although it’s rewarding when other people recognise and appreciate our symbols, we still have and constantly use our own personal symbols on a sub-conscious level, regardless of approval from others. Conscious choice, including close attention to detail to our symbols can result in a more vivid and rewarding reality. For me, such details as beautiful locations; quirky situations and genuine, happy people feature as some of the symbols I choose to express my chosen experience of existence. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=52 Helen Noble Sun, 28 Oct 2007 00:00:00 GMT The most famous trial in the history of ancient Athens was that of the philosopher Socrates. Ironically it was his influence that helped form the modern practice of court advocacy. Philosophers and Orators were known as ‘sophists’ in the early 6th century; although Socrates and others referred, rather disparagingly to individuals hired to argue a point in the courts as ‘guns for hire’ * Socrates, although synonymous with the founding of western philosophy, actually believed (if the writings of Xenophon and Plato are to be accepted as accurate) that the best way for people to live was to focus on self-development rather than the pursuit of material wealth. He always invited others to try to concentrate more on friendships and a sense of true community. At his trial his accusers had 3 hours in which to prove their case for corruption against him; and he himself was allowed 3 hours in which to respond, under the eye of the court water clock. Socrates felt that the best way for people to grow together was as a populace. His words translated into actions as he accepted his death sentence, rather than run away from or go against the will of his community - expressed by the jury, all 360 of them, who awarded him with death by poisoning. The influence of Socrates continues into the psychological, self-help techniques of the C21st . It has been asserted** that the secret of Socrates was his ‘Socratic ’ method of questioning which was based upon getting a ‘yes, yes’ response. He was viewed as asking questions with which his opponent would have to agree, a process that continued until he had accumulated ‘an armful of yes’. Socrates’ style was to continue asking such questions until his opponent found himself embracing the conclusion he would have vehemently disputed just minutes previously. Within Cognitive therapy, Socratic questioning is also referred to as the process of ‘guided discovery’. It is believed that asking questions promotes reflection, which in turn produces knowledge. Padesky and Greenburger (1995) view this process as ‘ a cornerstone of cognitive therapy’, which is used to uncover negative, automatic thoughts and beliefs and to construct alternative and adaptive thoughts and beliefs. The key to guided discovery is the driving curiosity to understand the client’s viewpoint. As Beck et al (1993) explain, ‘questions should be phrased in such a way that they stimulate thought and increase awareness, rather than requiring a correct answer’. This enables the client to provide his or her own answers, and not to rely on the interpretation offered by the therapist. The use of silence is also strategic within guided discovery as premature intervention may interrupt the thought process, so disrupting the purpose of the questioning, and corrupting the client-therapist dialogue. In turn the process may serve to put clients into a ‘questioning ‘ rather than an ‘automatic response’ mode. Padesky identified four stages in guided discovery*** · Asking informational questions · Listening attentively and reflecting back · Summarizing newly acquired information · Asking analytical or synthesizing questions to apply the new information to the client’s original problem or thinking. It is believed that the modelling of Socratic questioning assists clients to observe and practice the skill themselves, which in turn leads to ‘self therapy’. So, perhaps the essence of the teachings of Socrates as emerging from 6th century Athenian law and politics has subsisted, re-surfacing in 21st century psychology for a fair(er) hearing? What do you think? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk *‘Ancient Law for the Modern Lawyer’, The legal Executive Journal October 2007. ** Handbook of Hypnotic Suggestions and Metaphors, Hammond, D C., (1990) ***A keynote address delivered at the European Congress of Behavioural and Cognitive Therapies (1993) http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=53 Helen Noble Mon, 15 Oct 2007 00:00:00 GMT I have found the concept of ‘one’ featuring in various contexts lately. On an individual psychological level, ‘oneness’ equates to a state of integrity; where congruency in thought, word and deed is believed to enhance the individual’s level of self-esteem. So enhancing psychological well-being and positive experiences. The notion of oneness has always resonated within religious and spiritual contexts, and now it seems to have entered the political and legal arenas. In a recent e-mail from the One Campaign to Make Poverty History, the practical act of adding one line for an additional name to a property deed was described as the difference between ‘poverty and hope’ in some developing countries for a woman and her family. In many places, there is only one line for one name on a property ownership form – that of the husband. In the unfortunate and not uncommon event of the death of the husband, then the ownership of the property does not pass onto his surviving wife and /or family. There is now a US based political initiative attempting to pass through Congress the GROWTH (Global Resources and Opportunities for Women to Thrive) Act. This Act is designed to achieve the addition of just one more line to a legal property document to assist and enhance the financial status of individual women and one parent families in developing countries. www.one.org http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=54 Helen Noble Sat, 6 Oct 2007 00:00:00 GMT Positive psychology and coaching share the focus on developing individual strengths as a means to enhance happiness and well-being. Individual strengths have been explained in terms of a ‘natural recurring pattern of thought, feeling or behaviour that can be productively applied.’* It has been asserted that within individuals there is an ’intrinsic motivation to use the strength’; previously identified by Horney (1951) and Rogers (1963) as ‘constructive, directional tendencies that guide them towards realising their potentialities.’ The 5 positive character strengths of love; hope; gratitude; curiosity and zest, have been positively correlated with the experience of life as pleasant, engaging and essentially meaningful. ** However the knowledge of such personal strengths alone is not seen as sufficient to ensure the beneficial experience which may be conferred. Govindji and Linley*** have asserted and tested the theory that people who know their strengths, use their strengths and follow the directions that are right for them experience greater happiness. This ‘self-concordance’ is recognised as a more successful strategy when choosing and implementing goals, as it is intertwined with the core concepts associated with well-being, self esteem and self efficacy. Rosenberg (1979) explained self -esteem in terms of an individual having an overall, positive evaluation of themselves; and Bandura (1997) explains self –efficacy as the individual’s belief in their own ability to achieve goals. Thus knowing your strengths, coupled with the conscious shaping your life and seeking opportunities so as to maximise your naturally rewarding abilities, can result in a living a life with a greater sense of fulfilment and happiness. Peterson et al**** have concluded that the happiest people are those with the fullest lives; and that the five positive character strengths appeared to be those that made a full life experience possible. * Clifton, D.O & Anderson (2002) StrengthsQuest: Discover and develop your strengths in academics, career and beyond. Washington , DC The Gallup Organisation ** Park, N, Peterson, C. & Seligman M.E.P (2006) Character strengths in fifty four nations and the fifty US States. Journal of Positive Psychology, 3, 118-129; and Seligman (2002) Authentic Happiness’ New York, Free Press. *** ‘Strengths use, self-concordance and well-being: Implications for Strengths Coaching and Coaching Psychologists. International Coaching psychology review, Vol 2 No. 2, July 2007 ****Peterson, C., Park, N. & Seligman M.E.P (2005b) Orientations to happiness and life satisfaction : the full life versus the empty life. Journal of Happiness Studies, 6 25-41. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=55 Helen Noble Mon, 10 Sep 2007 00:00:00 GMT How do you relax? How often are you able to ‘switch off’ from all of your cares and concerns (if ever)? Is sleep your only respite from all of the trials and tribulations of the daily grind, or do you actively build in ‘time out’? I have spent the last week or so immersed in the world of cognitive hypnotherapy and must say that I found it satisfyingly effective, both on a personal and professional level. In my view, the best way to evaluate anything is (if possible) to experience it first hand. And although my hand may have not lifted in the levitation experiment, the sound core principles of this particular practice, which is built on the historical concept of hypnosis yet now firmly supported by scientifically- produced evidence – is an experience I would recommend to virtually anyone looking for an effective form of psychological relief. Relaxation exercise coupled with positive, self- strengthening suggestions, is a gentle yet powerful combination. I witnessed others experiencing a noticeable sense of calm; and for me, that inner calm is a deep shade of Aegean blue. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=56 Helen Noble Fri, 17 Aug 2007 00:00:00 GMT Coaching …… • is concerned with the direction of positive change • works at the level of the individual ( chaos theory informs us that a tiny change can lead to an enormous effect) • is about facilitating self-directed learning and development; allowing people to discover creative solutions to problematic situations • is 75% listening • and is 100% about asking the RIGHT questions • is a time saving technique • is a constructive, definitive goal- orientated process • largely takes the form of interpersonal dialogue to promote and enhance personal potential People…. . • often know more thank they think they know • usually already have the resources necessary for improving their own performance • are always responsible for their own achievements • can choose to respond to challenges positively and view setbacks as opportunities for greater learning…if they so wish • often harvest successfully; reaping the rewards of their strategically sound sowing skills. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=57 Helen Noble Fri, 27 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT Your life is important. Whether you achieve what you want in life matters. Whether you are happy matters. Honour and fight for your own potential. Self realisation is the noblest goal of your existence.’ To achieve this it has been asserted that you need to live ‘consciously’* This theory operates on the premise that human consciousness exists along a continuum and we are able to raise our own individual levels of consciousness at will, something akin to sweeping a flashlight along the horizon of our own individual experiences. Such consciousness or awareness can be achieved with practice and adherence to certain principles. Although the issues of self-responsibility and self- esteem are in themselves cornerstones of positive, psychological human functioning; they are also key players in the development of self-awareness or conscious living. Self- acceptance and the practice of choices rooted in reality, are also believed to be intrinsic to the act of living consciously. For me, heightened awareness constitutes possession of the relevant information, as well as knowing what we wish to do with it, and how we intend to achieve our aims. An element of aerial perspective will surely assist us with this process. If we can overlook all the necessary elements and seek to respond flexibly when a slight (or major) change is required we can still maintain our overall perspective. So, to think of ourselves as in the watchtower of our own thinking, surveying and reflecting on our reasoning, decisions and actions, and the impact of that on the lifescape laid out in front of us could be a useful standpoint from which to direct the route of our existence. *Nathaniel Branden ‘The Art of Living Consciously’ http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=58 Helen Noble Thu, 26 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT Low levels of motivation can occur due to a lack of perceived reward for our efforts. Basically, if we don’t believe that we’re getting to where we want to be, eventually we’ll stop trying and so stop achieving. However, waiting around for some ‘outside’ approval or reward does not guarantee us receiving whatever it is we think that we want. In fact, the reward is often most effective when it comes from within us. To reward ourselves is to validate our own efforts and achievements and so strengthen our resolve to continue to achieve. Also as we are not reliant on external factors , we are able to reward ourselves at any time and as often as we so choose. So how can we achieve this? Try the following five step guide. 1. Start the day by prioritising the things/activities that you actively want to do. We all have commitments and tasks we don’t enjoy fully and the key is not to plan too much time in for them. A classic error of judgement here is to allocate too much time for menial, uninspiring tasks and to only permit limited time for the more intrinsically rewarding activities. This is a pointless, self- punishing measure we erroneously employ when we have a irrational sense of guilt about experiencing enjoyment. However, as we have a naturally higher level of motivation to engage in/with the things we enjoy, allowing more time will ensure the satisfactory completion of the pleasant tasks and so place us in a more positive frame of mind and therefore more likely to succeed at the less enjoyable jobs. You may find that a natural balance between the two will ensue. 2. Flexibility - as with physical development , a flexible mind necessitates stretching and experimentation. Being open to considering possibilities and changes is the first step in the practice of flexibility; whereas remaining flexible requires a sense of balance , which we can achieve with awareness and vigilance. By keeping our options open, being prepared for more than the obvious, we are better placed for utilising the unexpected opportunities that may come our way. We are also less likely to experience frustration when events go awry courtesy of the influence of external factors – those over which we have no influence. This is especially the case, if we have a quick alternative for the use of our time lined up in the wings and waiting to go. 3. The 3 R’s - Reflect, Re-evaluate and if necessary, Re-schedule. Flexibility can be enhanced by these processes. Take advantage of a natural break in your day to reflect on how things are progressing. If your time is appearing to become more limited or extended then a re-evaluation of your intended activities might prove fruitful. This is also a good point for a reward. Remind yourself how making it this far through the day, having achieved all the things to this current point, is something to celebrate. And be prepared to re-schedule any cancellations on the part of another, at your convenience. 4. Respect and trust your own decisions, plans or arrangements. They were made with your knowledge, insight and reason so why let someone else rearrange things to suit their needs at the expense of yours? A refusal need not be offensive, so if your boss asks you to stay late it’s fine to explain that you have a prior commitment on this occasion. You’re not saying you’ll never stay late or arrive early , and you may want to offer up an alternative solution to help out with the situation. If you are both sincere in your intentions ( yours to assist and her/ him to do a good job)then the situation will resolve itself. You cannot be responsible for the intentions or behaviour of another but you can always choose your own response in a given situation. 5. Finally, reward yourself for the day’s achievement(s). It does not follow that for you to receive a reward, someone else will have to miss out on anything. So spend some time with yourself or someone of your choice; engaging in something refreshing, revitalising or relaxing; perhaps invest in something that you will benefit from in a wholesome way. Remember that you investing in yourself will enhance life for those around you, and on becoming motivationally self-sufficient, you will be setting an example, and showing others how it can be achieved. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=59 Helen Noble Fri, 13 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT Selfishness or self-responsibility? What’s the difference? We are surrounded with an array of self-help literature. So how so we choose? What is it that we want to achieve…to be a better parent, manager, lover? Why do we perceive the need to be better at something? Is it because we are always being told there is room for improvement or do we genuinely believe that progress is essential to a meaningful existence? Self- development can be seen as form of self-investment , so if we choose to invest in ourselves, is this then a purely selfish act? During a recent coaching session I found myself distinguishing between selfishness and self-responsibility. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines selfishness as ‘[that] quality or state…[of] supreme self love…[or] preference which leads a person to direct his purposes to the advancement of his own interest, power of happiness without regarding those of others’. So then to the opposite selflessness…I found associations with altruism and self-sacifice and ultimately self-less – a sort of self-denial? I can see this as a perspective enhancing practice, but is this a viable long-term solution for progress? What then of the practice of self-responsibility? I reasoned that a selfish act is one, that by it’s nature, serves to detract from someone/something else in some way; whereas a self-responsible act will not affect another in a negative or detrimental way. We can assuage our own needs without taking from another and without expecting someone else to provide for us. The American Declaration of Independence enshrined the concept of inalienable rights regarding ‘the individual as and end in him/herself, not a means to the ends of others, and not the property of family, church, state or society.’ Also the British Constitution, although unwritten, works on the principle that as citizens we are free to do whatever we like – unless there is a specific law prohibiting it. Are these historical philosophies as contained within these relatively ‘old’ documents of relevance to how we currently function on a social level? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=60 Helen Noble Tue, 10 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT A TV news feature this week claimed that City law firms are experiencing difficulty in retaining new recruits. Apparently, individuals leaving are citing ‘stress’ induced health issues as a major reason; and are seeking to achieve more of a work/life balance and less of a prestigious, all- consuming career with a top- notch firm. When a friend from law- school days (now on fast-track to partnership in a high ranking city firm) came for a weekend visit recently, we found ourselves betting on how long she could refrain from consulting her Blackberry… The law Society representative interviewed in response, dismissed the phenomena largely as a case of ‘that’s how it’s always been in city firms and it’s not to everyone’s taste’ so to speak. However, having been in and around the profession for a while now, there is evidence in a shift even in the more provincial firms; and a solicitor friend of just a couple of years experience, is already contemplating working for herself. Post- qualification experience is now being sidelined in favour of management training programmes, so allowing the newly- qualified to practice solely. How long then, until a movement like the North American www.timeday.org sprouts here in the UK? (or has it already?) A recent survey of employee holiday entitlement in the industrialised West, showed that the UK featured as the pen-ultimate place for low-levels of leave. However, in recent times policy decisions within the some government agencies have provided for the negotiation of flexible working conditions for people with children under the age of five; or with a dependant, aged or infirm relative. There is still no doubt though, that for those wanting to climb the corporate ladder, ‘time out’ leaves you well and truly behind in the race. So how is it? Is it a case of more people, as individuals, doing as they see fit, making the right decisions and taking the appropriate action in light of their own needs? Or can it perhaps be seen as an example of the ‘Wisdom of Crowds’, a most interesting concept/phenomena asserted by James Surowiecki? How is it that a shift necessary to change the concept of work to be accepted as just a part of life will occur? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=61 Helen Noble Fri, 29 Jun 2007 00:00:00 GMT The subtle undercurrent of boundary issues has been present lately. For example, one client has been experiencing (an unwanted) cross- over from a professional to a personal relationship with a colleague. As such she has found herself having to deal with emotional issues which she feels are not her responsibility, although she acknowledges that she has co-created the situation by allowing it to happen. Feeling that she has enough on her plate at the moment, she has decided to reinstate the boundary between them. As she will soon be moving into her new home , she has decided to change her previous ‘open-door’ policy and use the front door step as her marker for choice. New home, new practices. Only those actively invited in will cross the threshold into her newly- created private space. I guess that’s a prime example of the ‘behavioural’ outcome as created by a cognitive shift; and a pro-active approach created by the acceptance of self-responsibility. Then there’s a client whose respect for the boundaries of others has been questioned, who feels his behaviour is unjustly subject to public scrutiny. At present he has to tolerate the intrusion by others and has decided the best way in which to respond is to invest in himself. By creating his own personal benchmarks, he is seeking to demonstrate his ability to acknowledge and respect the boundaries of others. And I believe he will succeed. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=62 Helen Noble Mon, 25 Jun 2007 00:00:00 GMT Change (in my understanding) essentially means moving from one existential or subjective state into another. The apparent ‘reality’ of the state is relevant to the strength of the perception of those involved and the reflections cast upon the situation at any one brief point in time. Take for example, a wedding ceremony. Two people enter a building, say some words, write their names and are then viewed by themselves and others as being ‘changed’ in some way. The nature of that ‘way’ is subject to the interpretation of the person assessing the change. For example in the terms of Greek law, the wife effectively becomes a chattel or possession of the husband. Whereas under the more recently created UK law of civil partnership, there is a recognised choice of two equal individuals. I recently guested at a wedding where all those in attendance were invited as they are currently playing an important supportive role in the lives of the newly- weds. For me, there was an all- pervading sense of progress. People were talking about their futures and there was noticeably little reminiscing of the past, despite the fact there were some present who had known each other for a relatively long time. The general consensus seemed to be an acceptance of where we are all at, regardless of how we got here. Although there were a few interesting tales of jungle trails and days of romanticised poverty, the story tellers were still focused firmly on the on the future, which created a refreshing, uplifting atmosphere around the table. Change is often regarded as the creation or establishing a noticeable difference; and quite often something to be avoided, due to its unknown and therefore fearful nature. I see change as an ongoing merging and diversifying flow of channels, all ultimately connected but not all necessarily in conscious awareness at the same time. In that sense we can always be aware of a sensation of change, subject to varying levels of intensity and concentration. As with all emerging estuaries, or newly planted seeds, channelling or nurturing will achieve growth and the fruition of changes will become apparent at differing rates. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=63 Helen Noble Mon, 18 Jun 2007 00:00:00 GMT Is your life purposely planned with meticulous detail as to time and place where you expect to find yourself right now as well as some years hence? Is it true to say that only people who know exactly what they want and how to achieve it, will undoubtedly experience unqualified success? So what about when the unexpected crops up? How does that fit in with your preconceived notions and carefully laid plans? It’s the nature of that ‘fit’ that will determine largely how you experience the unscheduled changes to your grand plan. If you invest in the schema theory, which essentially asserts that we organise our thoughts, feelings and experiences into pro- forma schemas – templates established early in life (and therefore by definition immature and perhaps even faulty) – then your ability to absorb the new experience into an existing schema will determine your response to the change(s) For me, schema theory goes some way to explaining lots of social phenomena – and perhaps most notably discrimination, in all its forms. If we interpret all new experiences within the context of existing schemas, then the less exposition to new and different experiences we encounter, the greater will be the tendency to interpret the new within the framework of the old - hence the lack of satisfactory fit. From this perspective it is important to acknowledge our formative influences, however as it the positive and progressive nature of most cognitive- based theories and techniques – the empowerment arises not from the knowledge of what happened in the past but from the recognition of what changes are possible here in the present. Although developing insight into how you actually got to be where you are at is very useful, accepting self- responsibility for where you are at, regardless of how you got there, is the first step in initiating change. From there, the steps you choose to take and the progress you make will naturally ebb and flow and occasionally divert; and maybe even reverse. However the first step will then undoubtedly exist in your cognitive and emotional memory alongside the more ancient, ingrained, habitual patterns. This first move could then be the start of a totally new direction. It could figure loosely as an option you might wish to take up in the future; or it could always remain as a ‘what if…’ There has long been a nature v nurture debate, and it could be viewed that our cognitive schemas and/or behavioural tendencies are part of our DNA coding. However, the blueprint is only one stage in a creation, and it is when we are able to manage the mechanics and control our responses to our immediate environment that we can effect change(s) http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=64 Helen Noble Wed, 6 Jun 2007 00:00:00 GMT From confusion to clarity - what happens and how do we get there? I think we experience clarity when there is an absence of dissonance in our thinking. Dissonance, or discomfort, occurs when we are undecided or unresolved about an issue, or a situation that we perceive as affecting us in a personal way. A moment of clarity has often been referred to as a ‘breakthrough’; or an experience of ‘seeing the light’ in a given situation. Many people have described physical feelings of lightness of being and/ or of having a ‘weight’ lifted from their shoulders. For me, a moment of clarity is when a solution to a problem arises in my mind’s eye, ( I have an active, visual imagination) and is accompanied with a feeling of relaxation or calm. However, from what I have heard and understood from others, the perceived sudden release might give way to feelings of excitement and higher levels of motivation to achieve solutions to other issues or challenges- something more akin to a 'eureka' moment. Whichever way you experience clarity, I believe there is a process of congruence involved – where, however momentarily, your perception of your external surroundings and influences are reflected in your inner landscape; and where all your internal dialogue and emotions are at one with your immediate environment. So then, how to increase the clarity? Any ideas? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=65 Helen Noble Mon, 28 May 2007 00:00:00 GMT Do you subscribe to the belief that creative people are inherently disorganised? Is the essence of creativity stifled by the imposition of organisation? And does it follow that diligent, disciplined people are not highly creative? Edward de Bono* has asserted that efficiency and creativity actually serve to complement one another. He has claimed that ‘creativity can be as deliberate as mathematics’, and he believes that new ideas can be generated by using lateral thinking methods which might appear totally unrelated to the creative project in hand. Further he explains how minimising the risks of financial failure of creative ideas can be achieved with a little design effort; as efficiency will extract the maximum benefit from the new idea. Not comfortable with that take on the treatment of creativity? Well, recent research by Nemeth and Ormiston** seeks to oust the comfort loving and claim that greater levels of creativity are possible when familiar team membership is re-jigged to form fresh alliances. The more traditional thinking on this subject has been that if you keep team membership constant, people in the team are going to grow familiar and comfortable, and lose any fear of proposing ideas, which is then seen as resulting in a rise in morale and correlating higher levels of creative output. However this notion has been strongly challenged and it has been shown that, while stable teams are judged more friendly and comfortable than newly-formed teams, the cost for failing to mix up team membership is a loss of creativity. In their study, it was the newly-formed teams who generated more ideas (an average of 28 ideas versus 23), and according to two independent judges their ideas were also better quality and more diverse. The researchers state that their ‘…current study underscores the theory that 'change' and the introduction of new perspectives are more important than comfort, belonging and friendliness for idea generation and creativity’. They advise that managers should avoid the temptation to retain individuals in groups that have previously worked successfully together, and organise the teaming of individuals who have not previously worked together in order to enhance the creative process. * www.managementissues.com **Nemeth, C.J.&Ormiston, M. (2007). Creative idea generation:Harmony versus stimulation. European Journal of Social Psychology, 524-535. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=66 Helen Noble Fri, 25 May 2007 00:00:00 GMT There are 360 degrees to every point and the appearance of every point varies greatly with the angle of perception. It’s more far more useful to think about how things are interpreted in the instant, than perhaps viewing them in a more rigid sense of ‘how they are’. 'Visualise yourself doing it' is a common direction for people seeking to achieve something. However there are a variety of ways to visualise yourself in a particular scene. From a first-person perspective we can project our potential thoughts and feelings into a scene, trying to make it as authentic a creation as possible. This can be effectively achieved through practices such as hypnotherapy. However recent research* suggests that visualising yourself performing a certain act from an external perspective, as an independent observer might see you, is more effective in terms of actual performance of the desired behaviour. The theory behind these findings is that humans tend to interpret other people's actions as saying something about them, whereas we interpret our own actions as saying more about the situation we're in. Thus, when we picture ourselves acting in the third-person, we see ourselves as an observer would, as the 'kind of person' who performs that behaviour. Therefore transferring the attributes of ‘someone’ who is likely to perform the desired behaviour to ourselves is believed to increase the likelihood of us achieving our goal(s). *Libby, L.K., Shaeffer, E.M., Eibach, R.P. & Slemmer, J.A. (2007). Picture yourself at the polls. Visual perspective in mental imagery affects self-perception and behaviour. Psychological Science, 18, 199-203. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=67 Helen Noble Sat, 12 May 2007 00:00:00 GMT Ever been advised to ‘just be yourself’? Ever thought ‘just what does this mean’? It’s open to interpretation, so I think it is more helpful to focus on the self- strengths and qualities you are familiar with, rather than the self-tripping aspects of yourself. For example, I recently attended a screen test for a TV presenting job. Being well aware of the ‘age limit’ and in the knowledge that I exceeded it, I accepted the advice to ‘just be myself’. So I endeavoured to consign the negative thoughts of age and the 10 pounds camera rule to the ‘not useful for this purpose folder’; and concentrated my thoughts on formulating ways to express and demonstrate the qualities I thought might help project an appropriate representation of ‘myself’. Engagement (in conversation) is usually a sign that you are presenting your chosen material effectively; if someone is interested enough to ask a question then you have tentatively established a potential link. From here you have the chance to build your image by introducing more of your qualities/abilities, not necessarily in the form of a fact but perhaps more subtly and effectively by way of illustration and use of humour. Admittedly this can get a little more complex when there is more than one interviewer; you have props/ material to manage; and you have other angles such as those being monitored by the camera to consider. However, talking about your abilities and positive experiences is far easier if you are not constantly referencing the thoughts that seek to sabotage your attempts. Then there is the social context to consider. For example, if someone else in the room is smiling at you, it makes it easier for you to continue with your train of thought and delivery. You may feel ‘acceptable’ to the others. However your interaction may feel hampered if the lack of a smile is unsettling you. Being aware of the mirroring social effects is the first step in managing them. Accept you cannot control them and you may not be tempted to try and make that person smile (maybe throwing yourself off track in the process). See the situation as a dynamic interaction, subject to your influence and choose how you wish to present yourself. Thinking is a habit and as such with repeated practice we can strengthen the positive thoughts and weaken the not so helpful. Picking out the positive in any situation can be a useful skill to develop – choosing to use what you have learned and recognising possible future applications is a dynamic process which may propel you in your chosen direction. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=68 Helen Noble Mon, 7 May 2007 00:00:00 GMT When we talk of an athlete being ‘in the zone’ or maybe an artist being ‘in the flow’, what we are witnessing is an individual so focused on a task that they are able to maximise their performance. It is believed that their high level of pleasure of the experience facilitates the attainment of mastery of their skill. It is reported* that such intense engagement with a task results in the individual’s loss of self-consciousness; that their actions and awareness merge to develop a heightened sense of control during an often altered perception of time. It is asserted** that flow is most commonly experienced when the level of a challenge is high and thus the skills of the individual are fully tested. If the task is pitched at too high a level then the individual’s response slows down and they may become anxious. However, if a task is too easy, the individual can experience boredom. Current research*** suggests that we are most likely to experience flow when we are engaged in a task which utilises one or more of our personal strengths. By definition, a strength is a natural capacity for behaving, thinking or feeling in a way that facilitates our optimal functioning or performance. Martin Seligman**** has identified an array of ‘signature strengths’ and asserts that by discovering, accepting and choosing to use and enhance these strengths, we are more likely to experience success in life. Utilising the 3 conditions necessary for flow previously identified*, Wesson and Boniwell *****have compiled a ‘flow -enhancing model of coaching’ which consists essentially of 7 prerequisites · Having a clear set of goals · Achieving a balance between perceived challenges and perceived skills. · Maintaining the goal congruence · Placing importance on the desired achievement(s) · Receiving clear and immediate feedback on performance · Having a higher level of autonomy orientation, or being self directed · Having a high level of capacity for absorption, by being open to new ideas or possibilities and having a higher level of awareness of emerging issues and opportunities. Wesson and Boniwell assert the need for the development of awareness as to how to achieve the desired state of flow; developing the skills to manage it effectively so as to enhance life experience; and also, how to let go of the practice when necessary. This last bit surprised me somewhat. Why, after attaining such a state would we choose to desist from a practice that enhances it? Is it a purely selfish act? Surely we would all benefit from being in the flow? I suppose we might find ourselves flowing in different directions from those close to or maybe dependant on us, which might not have been our intention? Any thought streams flowing? If so, e-mail helen@fromulaforchange.co.uk *Csikszentmihalyi, M., Abuhandeh, S. &Nakamura, J. (2005) ‘Flow’ In A. J. Elliot & C. S dweck (Eds), Handbook of competence and motivation ( pp598-608) **Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1992) Flow: the psychology of happiness. *** Linley P.A & Harrington, S. (2006a) Playing to your strengths. The Psychologist, 19, 86-89 **** Seligman, M.E.P (2003) Authentic happiness – using the new positive psychology to realise your potential for lasting fulfilment. ***** Wesson, K & Boniwell,I. (2007) Flow theory – its application to coaching psychology, International Coaching Psychology Review, vol. 2, No1 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=69 Helen Noble Tue, 1 May 2007 00:00:00 GMT An article in the Harvard Business Review* identifies resilience as, ‘something you realize you have after the fact’ and claims that ‘more than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails’. A useful definition of resilience is ‘the human capacity to face, overcome and be strengthened or transformed by the adversities of life’. I first came across the notion of resilience when working with children and families, where the work of resilience building/promoting amongst people facing or responding to adversity, starts with three short phrases, I have… I am… I can… It is believed ** that resilience is a basic human capacity, nascent in all children, which can be nurtured through use of the appropriate words, actions and environment; and some of the words denoting the phenomena of resilience read as such personal qualities as ‘autonomy’, ‘independence’, 'responsible’, ’empathic’ and ‘altruistic’. So applied to the experience of life, the quality of resilience, often popularly perceived as the ability to ‘bounce back’ has been elucidated as consisting of three major components · A staunch acceptance or crystal clarity about the reality of our situation (I have) · A deep belief that life is meaningful and purposeful (I am) · The ability to improvise – recognising more choices and resources (I can) * Harvard Business Review ‘How resilience works’ (May 2002 p46) ** A guide to Promoting resilience in Children: Strengthening the Human Spirit, E.H. Grotberg Ph.D, The International Resilience Project. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=70 Helen Noble Sun, 29 Apr 2007 00:00:00 GMT A recent survey conducted by the UK government Department of Skills and Education revealed that 44% of the women interviewed reported not having received a ‘love letter’ in the preceding period of 10 years. Some might argue that the advent of electrical communications has contributed to the decline of the tradition of letter writing. However research* conducted at the University of Texas at Austin has utilised electrical communications systems alongside the more traditional practice of writing, to reveal the positive effects of the act of writing about feelings on personal relationships. Essentially, participants were requested to write down their ‘deepest thoughts and feelings about their current relationship’, setting aside a period of 20 minutes for each of 3 consecutive days for this purpose. The researchers then analysed instant messaging and email communications between the participants and their partners, recorded before and after the writing exercises. They found that after a participant had written about their relationship for three days, both they and their partner used more positive emotional words during communication with each other. The results revealed that 77 % of the participants were still in the same relationship 3 months later. *Slatcher, R B & Pennebaker, JW (2006) How do I love thee? Let me count the words. The social effects of expressive writing. Psychological Science, 17, 660-664 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=71 Helen Noble Mon, 23 Apr 2007 00:00:00 GMT The concept of mindfulness is becoming part of cognitive –behavioural based therapies, as the theory and practice of the technique is regarded by some as congruent with both the theory and practice of classic CBT. This is partly due to the recognition that both practices emphasise the detachment from or objective viewing of thought; acceptance of the self; and the practice of self responsibility in the sphere of personal emotions and consequent behaviour. In very broad terms, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) advocates acceptance as a base line to which it always desirable to return; and Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT) advocates the need for the development of emotional insight if engagement in therapy is to result in sustained changes in thinking and behaviour. Cayoun* had conceptualised mindfulness with dual strands of ‘metacognitive’ awareness and ‘interoception’. Whereas metacognitive awareness represents the human ability to perceive our own thoughts, interoception is the process by which we are aware of our bodily sensations. He explains how regular practice can serve to increase acuity of both these senses. There is also some evidence** to suggest that physical changes occur in the brain as a result of the practice of mindfulness through meditation. It has been noted that parts of the cerebral cortex of people who meditate are noticeably and it is believed this results in the protection of other parts of the brain from age-related thinning. It is reported that the brain scans of 20 practitioners of Buddhist Insight meditation, who meditated for an average of 40 minutes per day revealed the development of thicker tissue in the right anterior insula region of the brain, which is involved in the monitoring of bodily sensations, and in parts of the of the prefrontal cortex, which is involved with attention and sensory processing. This area was noticeably thicker in older participants who practised meditation when compared to the brain scans of participants of the same age within the control group ( and who did not practice meditation). *Cayoun , B A (2005) A four stage model of mindfulness-based cognitive –behavioural therapy. **Lazar, S. W., Kerr, C. E., Wasserman, R. H., Gray, J. R., Greve, D. N., Treadway, M. T., McGarvey, M., Quinn, B. T., Dusek, J. A., Benson, H., Rauch, S. L., Moore, C. I. & Fischl, B. Meditation experience is associated with increased cortical thickness. NeuroReport, 16, 1893-1897. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=72 Helen Noble Thu, 19 Apr 2007 00:00:00 GMT Intuition is our capacity for direct knowledge or immediate insight without any apparent observation or reason. Daniel Kahneman has referred to intuitive thinking as ‘perception- like, rapid, effortless’ in comparison to deliberate thinking which is ‘reasoning-like, critical and analytic’. Recent research* has concluded that learning can occur via two distinct systems - an explicit hippocampus based system and an implicit intuitive system more dependent on the brain’s reward pathways. The researchers explain their suggestion that ‘the brain areas associated with implicit reward- association decisions are dissociable from those supporting the explicit forms of decision making’ and conclude that their ‘findings suggest that it may be useful to rely on intuition to guide decisions, particularly when explicit memory fails.’ I have on many occasions based a decision or judgement on what I have understood to be my intuition, or gut instinct. Although I am aware of some knowledge of facts in a situation I cannot explain my choice in the form of a fully- reasoned and evidence based process. Part of me likes to toy with the notion that this is perhaps an unexplained phenomena which more accurately belongs within the realms of extra or unearthly sensory/perceptive skills. However, on reading Malcolm Gladwell’s** concept of ‘thin slicing’ – or rapid cognition- I was strongly swayed to believe that perhaps intuition is just another explicit cognitive process , the mysteries of which will be unearthed by the power of cognitive neuro-psychology. Gladwell emphasises the imperative role of context in such rapid thinking and further explains how such a process which appears so uncannily accurate in so many instances is also subject to errors of process leading to the ‘wrong’ decisions. I find his case highly persuasive, although the jury is still very much out on this one. I have a feeling I might be mulling this one over for a while – unless of course I suddenly and inexplicably find my muse… *Frank, O Reilly, Curran (2006) Psychological Science 17, 700-707. ** ‘Blink- the power of thinking without thinking’ (2005) http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=73 Helen Noble Fri, 13 Apr 2007 00:00:00 GMT ‘…we will conserve only what we love and respect; we will love and respect only what we understand; we will understand only what we are taught or allowed to experience’ Baba Dioum (Senagalese conservationist) I largely agree with this statement, but only in terms of degrees of agreement and not in terms of absolute acceptance. It is a widely accepted notion (in psychological research) that humans are notoriously lacking when it comes to problem solving tasks, due to our apparent inability to transfer our thinking skills from one setting to another. As a psychology undergraduate I found myself conducting research on the streets of Brighton in an attempt to quantify just how lacking is our ability to ‘think outside the box’. Influenced by Edward de Bono’s concept of lateral thinking, amongst a myriad of other concepts, theories and philosophies, I have chosen always to ‘think’ my way around a problem or a situation in which I have believed myself (or another) to be ‘stuck’. This is an empowering strategy as it starts with the premise that something can always be achieved in any given situation – even if it is not what was perhaps initially intended. Problem solving is perhaps one of the most obvious vehicles for change; but does it follow that change is always about solving perceived problems? Is it about saying ‘stop’ when something is apparently not working, or maybe more about finding a different way of doing the same thing? Or perhaps applying the same process to a different subject? For me there are always many variations on a theme; shades of opinion and ways and means to achieve your desires. I find that by dropping out the ‘absolutes’, which can be applied to almost everything, a whole raft of new possibilities open up. Try telling yourself, that you can, or might be able to, in preference to ‘you should’ or ‘must’. In my view, creative thinking blossoms when allowed the space and often when it’s not under pressure to produce within the constraints of a pre-conceived format. For me , understanding arises sometimes when we are taught or maybe reflect on a concept; however, I see creativity as arising out of experience – so why not allow yourself the opportunity to experience and see what you can come up with? http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=74 Helen Noble Tue, 10 Apr 2007 00:00:00 GMT Are you a push- over? Or are you forever pulling it back? Resisting is in essence a push-pull mechanism. One that inevitably functions in a cyclical format, and sometimes appears to have a dead- lock facility. The thing is, when you find yourself pushing – you’re crossing over the line – moving out of your own space and leaving it unattended. Then it’s possible to find that when you return there’s something else in your space (for example, with me it’s usually extreme tiredness). Then there’s pulling. When you engage in pulling, it’s possible to bring something desirable into your space. However, it’s also possible to land yourself with a line full of far more than you had initially considered, usually in the form of extra responsibility and other such unseen consequences. There is another way of getting what you think you want; and avoiding that which you think is not for you. It’s through a process of building what we’ll call ‘resilience’ Resilience consists, (in my view) of two major components: acquiescence and self-investment. For example, when feeling on the end of someone else’s push or pull, it is effective to acquiesce – simply do nothing in response or by way of reaction to the momentum. The chances are that an immediate response will be less effective in terms of you achieving what you really want, than a more considered approach. Acquiescing affords you the time and opportunity to reflect and if necessary, amend your intended actions. Thus avoiding the possible consequences of ill-informed actions. If you decide to stick with your initial response then the chances are you will feel far more confident about your choice/ decision. Acquiescing is not as it might at first appear – as ‘doing nothing’. It is in fact a highly valuable and power- generating delay mechanism, which allows you to reclaim and harness all your potential before you initiate action. Self – investment is about evaluating everything you are thinking about in terms of how it can benefit you, and before we go any further I would just like to point out that does not preclude charitable acts or acts of great kindness towards others. Such acts intrinsically hold a reward for the initiator. Also I am not saying that self- benefit must amount to 100% of the outcome – even the smallest percentage may be a good enough reason to perform an action in some circumstances. It’s more about keeping an eye on your own investment and making sure you do not neglect your own interests at the expense of increasing the interests of another. It almost goes without saying that if you can not clearly see any benefit for yourself – then it’s unlikely to be worth your effort. If you want to talk/learn more about this feel free to contact me helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=75 Helen Noble Thu, 29 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT You’ve made a decision and feeling quite clear about the reasons why; you’ve even worked out exactly how you are going to make that change. Then, a loss of concentration or some emotional upset, and you’re right back there – doing what you said you wouldn’t, and not even enjoying it as you believed you would. Here come those feelings of annoyance and self- reproach for losing that grip. What can you do differently? Face the Space. You’re not going to die…it may not feel painful...you might even like it. Ask yourself, Is it just feeling of emptiness; an overwhelming fear of the unknown, or something inbetween? If you don’t light that cigarette, pour that drink, or make that call, what’s going to happen? Chances are you have a whole scenario already depicted in your imagination, how you fear things might be if you do, or if you don’t… The thing is it’s a work of pure fiction. Just an old storyline you are all too familiar with. The tale is wearing thin, the ending has become most unsatisfactory – it’s like you know there is more to all of this, it’s just that you can’t quite believe the ending might be exactly how you would like it to be. To find out what will happen, you have to not do it and sit back to see what really transpires. Stop, wait, and listen. Allow yourself the time and space to think and feel( and don’t forget to breathe) It’s just one moment in time and space. But it’s your moment, your opportunity to try something different, perhaps something new. So next time you find yourself there, reclaim your space – it’s yours for the taking – and make of it what you will. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=76 Helen Noble Mon, 26 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT I once received the message ‘thank you, you’ve been an inspiration’, written on a card from someone I had been working very closely with for some 18 months, on the day of our last meeting. It was early one Saturday morning some 2 years later before the full impact of its meaning dawned on me. If derived from the Greek word ‘inspire’ - meaning to draw breath- then that comment was possibly one of the most potent and meaningful I have ever been party to. It’s quite easy to work out the source of inspiration in that particular scenario as our professional work together was concentrated on one very specific area- it was in the individual’s belief in his ability to change. Despite years of self-doubt and self-sabotage and against all odds, this individual who we’ll call ‘Jed’ for ease of reference, was able to develop enough self- belief to get himself to where he wanted to be. He was able to challenge some 30 years of negative thinking and start to plan for and develop the necessary relationships to lay the foundations for a ‘new life’. Most of us can identify areas of our life/behaviour that we wish to change, and in themselves these distinct areas can appear insurmountable on occasions. Now imagine the challenge of re-writing the script for every aspect of your future existence. Past events are non- changing; we cannot alter the facts as most people would agree them. However we can reflect and develop insight into and around situations, people and events; and extract useful information to maybe help us the future. One of the most valuable sources of information we can extract from the past is the nature of our own beliefs, as they guide us, almost silently, through our choices and our experiences. Changing our beliefs to enable us to overcome obstacles is no mean feat. I admire anyone who chooses this course and I have to say that I feel inspired by people like ‘Jed’, who achieve such great things. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=77 Helen Noble Wed, 21 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT Leading journalist, editor and (adjunct) professor at the School of Medicine UCLA, Norman Cousins, has first hand experience of life threatening conditions including a major heart attack and cancer, initially described in 'Anatomy of an Illness'(1978). Determined to be positive, he described how he used humour and hope to nurse himself back to health. Later in 'Head First'* he set out to describe how the conscious cultivation of positive emotion can create the right internal environment for medicine to work effectively, and laid out more evidence for the great healing power of positive expectation and emotion Cousins described his belief that the emotions such as fear and despair cause biochemical damage and how positive attitudes promote wellness and healing. He supported his personal anecdotes with powerful scientific data demonstrating how the mind can hugely influence the course of illness and health; and sought to explain how the encouragement of confidence and hope in patients can function to activate all their resources against their illness. It is his belief that a cultivated positive attitude (in addition to good medical treatment) can facilitate good health. In more recent research, Julian Lai** (City University of Hong Kong) studied the physiological effects of thinking positively by measuring the level of the stress hormone cortisol in saliva samples. He noted that in both men and women, a generally positive mood during the preceding month was associated with the recording of lower cortisol levels in the body over the course of a day. Additionally, optimism was associated with lower cortisol levels after waking in the male participants. Also there is now widespread evidence that successful psychological therapies induce changes to brain function. A recent brain imaging study*** found brain changes indicating recovery and increased activity in evidence in people who had been diagnosed as suffering depression and/or obsessive compulsive disorders. An added benefit of psychological therapy as opposed to drug therapy is obviously the lack of the physical side effects associated with anti-depressant medication. So, add into the mix a study**** which claims that people who view themselves and their lives more abstractly (as opposed to concentrating on the concrete features) also hold more positive beliefs, so evaluating their experiences more optimistically… and you may start to get a sense of the power of positive thinking. *Cousins, Norman 'Head First: The Biology of Hope and the Healing Power of the Human Spirit' (1990) Penguin (Non-Classics) ISBN-10: 0140139656 **Lai et al (2005) ‘Optimism, positive affectivity and salivary cortisol’ British Journal of Health Psychology, 10, 467-484 ***Kumari, V. (2006) 'Do Psychotherapies Produce Neurobiological effects?' Acta Neuropsychiatrica 18, 61-70 ****Updegraff & Suh (2007) 'Happiness is a warm abstract thought: Self- construal abstractness and subjective well-being’ Journal of Positive Psychology, vol 2, issue , 18-28. http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=78 Helen Noble Mon, 19 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT To achieve balance in life is much easier when you practice assertiveness, as opposed to being passive or exhibiting aggression. Being ‘assertive’ means communicating your needs to others in a consistently firm but polite manner. When you choose to behave this way, it means essentially that you do not eclipse anyone else’s needs and neither are you allowing others to compromise your wants or desires. Wise words once heard at a Rolling Stones concert noted that ‘everyone here is occupying their own space’. Hence the concept and practice of mutual respect – as opposed to ‘standing up for yourself’ or ‘going out to get what you want’. In my opinion, these intentions or motivations contain an element of conflict or aggression, therefore overstepping the boundary of assertiveness. Assertiveness is not a performance art which can be taught – although it’s appearance may be successfully replicated – performance suggests an element of nervousness – whereas assertion feels comfortable – you are merely filling up your own space, by fulfilling your own needs and allowing others to do likewise. When all parties in a situation are feeling comfortable and content with the outcome then balance or harmony has been achieved. Whereas, if one party is feeling ‘bulldozed’ into submission; or manipulated by feelings of guilt; maybe fearful of threatened consequences, despite appearing to accord with the ground rules they may actually be plotting sabotage or even revenge… Being assertive means you can say exactly what you want, as long as you state it in a friendly and factual manner. If you don’t attach any strong emotions to the delivery of your communication then the chances are you won’t get an overly emotional response. However, should you use an aggressive response the chances are you will either get resistance or resentful, temporary compliance. if you choose to be passive then the chances are you won't get what you want and you will end up feeling resentful. Be aware that if you are communicating with someone who is equally clear minded, and able to explain their point in a firm but respectful manner you might find yourself in a situation of negotiation… and the best thing about that is you might achieve something even better than you had at first imagined! Let me know how you go… helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=79 Helen Noble Tue, 13 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT On a home visit to allow an erudite, elderly client to read and sign his newly drafted will- in theory a very specific task- I found myself sitting in a still room, for over an hour, listening in silence to his personal account of his wife’s recent death. After scrutinising the clauses to ensure they achieved his desires, and signing in a highly pragmatic manner, the gentleman kindly offered me a cup of tea. With nothing else really appropriate to discuss- other than the contents of his will- I asked him about his recent hospital experience , his first in a strange hospital in an unfamiliar area. After brushing aside his recent stay, he referred me to the hospital where his wife had spent her last days. He accounted for her thoughts and feelings during her last days and then described – to the actual minute – how she had ‘peacefully passed away’ whilst he sat along side her, reading the daily newspaper. That was his story to tell; and it was clearly important for him to bring to the table at that point in time. I just listened. He wasn’t looking for my comments or any expression of sympathy from me. He wanted me to listen - to bear witness to the memory of his beloved wife, maybe. When he finished, he looked at me, smiled and thanked me and I left his home. The act of listening is a very potent tool. It can function, in some situations as a life preserving skill. For example in UK prisons there is training provided for respected prisoners to act as ‘listeners’ for fellow prisoners. When an individual is fearful, anxious or depressed he can request the services of a listener - someone whom he can trust, to talk over his problems, concerns about his family outside or whatever issues he believes he has at that time, in the privacy of his cell. It is through listening that it is possible to glean all the necessary information to help or assist that person in some way. It is through active listening that patterns of thought; re-occurring themes and core issues experienced by people become apparent. Awareness of the thoughts and feelings of others enables you then to consider the most valuable ways in which you can assist them. So, effective listening – although it may appear to be a passive action, is in fact, anything but. Active listening helps the listener to gather the information necessary; store it in an organised manner; and process it to use at the optimum instance for the benefit of the person talking. It works. So why not try it? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=80 Helen Noble Wed, 7 Mar 2007 00:00:00 GMT Do you expect the view from your car windscreen to always remain the same, regardless of how many miles you may have covered in your journey? How about the accepted change of schedule of TV programmes from Summer to Autumn? Is it normal to expect the introduction of new faces from time to time in your favourite soap? So why is it we sometimes expect the horizon of our personal lives to remain largely unchanged? Surely we can expect an ever changing landscape with people and places passing in and out just as every other scene of life? What about the stage setting that once was (perhaps at the start of a relationship) and is now no longer recognisable… Contemporary research by Lewandowski and Bizzoco (2007)* reveals a high level of positive emotions experienced by individuals whose relationships had recently ended – even when the finite decision had actually not been theirs. Some 71% of participants stated their belief that they had ‘learned a lot more about themselves’ as a result of the process, despite it not being their choice to end the relationship. 58% reported feeling ‘energised’ and ‘hopeful’ and able to [do] ‘things I once enjoyed that I could not do while I was in my relationship’. ‘Reframing’ is a term largely associated with the practice of neuro- linguistic programming (NLP) and is a useful cognitive tool to assist with the development of perspective shifting. When feeling stuck in a situation or unable to see a way out, it can prove valuable to ask someone you know well and trust to reframe your situation. It’s a hypothetical exercise and you always retain the choice of view. For example, it can serve to free you from imaginary constraints; to shrink apparently insurmountable obstacles; or to open up a realm of hitherto unconsidered possibilities. A trained coach/practitioner may use the Socratic questioning method to (hypothetically) lead you out of your current situation and explore realistic possibilities. Thus helping you to transform your landscape and realise your options. In turn you might then choose to reinvest in interests or activities that have been discarded, maybe as they did not comfortably fit in with the framework of a relationship. However such interests are as much a part of ‘you’ as was the role you played in the relationship. Reclaiming is now widely regarded a virtuous and valuable act. So why not reframe and reclaim? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk *Lewandowski, G.W & Bizzoco, N. M. ‘Addition through subtraction’ The Journal of Positive Psychology (2007) 2, 40-54 http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=81 Helen Noble Mon, 26 Feb 2007 00:00:00 GMT A while back, after a significant departure into the world of forensic and clinical psychology, I took a step (back?) forwards into the legal profession. Not having practiced property law for some 6 years I found myself refreshing the skills necessary to once again play a part in a world where professional relationships appear strongly defined- with many practitioners adopting ‘traditional’ methods of communication; and the status quo thus remaining largely unchallenged for a couple of hundred years. At the outset I sought to establish a fresh ethos in my experience of legal practice -that of openness and clarity. Nothing new there -in theory; however that translated in practice to the creation of a policy whereby all communication is respectfully received and responded to. This one policy alone has proved very successful with professional counterparts in the property and financial sectors and has been met with curiosity from many fellow lawyers. As has been the tradition, the revealing of the cards your hand is a careful judgement call by many lawyers – even amongst their own – and perfectly understandable positions within a system which is adversarial in design. However, even modern texts advocate the practice of ‘defensive’ lawyering in non-contentious situations. So how can a business, which is essentially a service, flourish where each party starts from the premise that they have something to lose? I have adopted the stance that I (and all other parties) are in this situation as we all have something to gain. Why else would be here? This is not about an individual up against the might of the state (as is the case in many legal situations) it’s about providing a professional service on a human plane. So, I take calls- even when I have nothing of professional value to add to the existing situation at that precise moment in time. I find it is more valuable to spend a few minutes acknowledging the needs of the other party than to waste valuable time and energy ignoring them, or trying to deflect or divert the issue. Also, it is amazing how much you can learn from off- the- cuff conversations. I listen to the concerns of whoever is on the end of the phone, regardless of their status or level of understanding about the legal process. And I respond appropriately, always respectfully, even if my private thoughts on the situation might not prove so helpful… I start from the premise that there is something to gain from every situation – however it may be presented to me and have found that when faced with someone who is angry or demanding; maybe plainly arrogant and condescending – I can respond with genuine warmth and concern, and as the conversation progresses, I may even add a touch of humour … I have found the person concerned will call back another time with a wholly different and generally much more constructive approach. The most recent feedback received in relation to this policy of communications is that professional counterparts appreciate the ‘freedom of information act’ – or the fact that they can ask direct questions and get a satisfactory response within a reasonable time- frame and in a friendly manner. Additionally a fellow lawyer has commented on how he experiences communications with this practice as refreshing and was left to mull over the notion that we might actually function more effectively as counterparts rather than ‘competitors’. Do you have any smilar experiences? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=82 Helen Noble Wed, 21 Feb 2007 00:00:00 GMT With recent research* strongly indicating that owning a pet - particularly a dog - is beneficial for human physiological and psychological health you could be considering whether to invest in a pet. This could be a good time to draw up a costs and benefits comparison chart. After all, a dog is for life…and all of that. After some 17 years without a dog, our household invested in a puppy just over a year ago, largely as a result of my intuitive initiative and many false promises of regular walkies from other family members. Then, just as the sleep interference and house training was just about complete, someone else decided that some dog ‘company’ would be beneficial and so we invested in puppy number two. And of course, just as with that halcyon image of serene siblings playing most delightfully in perfect harmony forever more…we now have two very different dogs and twice the number of pet demands. So to the potential costs – • Financial – food, vet bills , kennel accommodation during holidays • Time - dogs like regular meals and exercise times • Possible forced exercise regime – eg early morning/late night walks • Damage – chewed shoes/furniture etc • Noise pollution – random acts of barking for no apparent reason • Dog odour – enough said! And the benefits – • Unconditional acceptance and affection– whatever time of day or however rough you might look or feel – they are always pleased to see you and they show it • Good company guaranteed. Dogs are always up for it, whatever it is. • Functionality as a favourably fashionable accessory – a good looking dog can get you noticed • Transference of canine qualities to humans – many people assume you are a nice, approachable person when you have a friendly dog and they are then more inclined to talk to you • Free entertainment for bored children (and parents) at weekends and in school holidays- just pick up a ball and throw it! • A good excuse to escape a tense atmosphere at home So now calculate using a points system, the sum of the benefits minus the costs and see what you get… helen@formulaforchange.co.uk *Dr Deborah Wells, British Journal of Health Psychology, 22nd January 2007 J McNicholas and G Collis, British Journal Of Psychology, (Vol 91) February 2000 Lynette A Hart, The Waltham Book of Human-Animal Interactions : Benefits and Responsibilities, Waltham http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=83 Helen Noble Mon, 12 Feb 2007 00:00:00 GMT Heart thumping, thoughts racing and banging around inside your head, you start to shake or sweat and know you need to do something fast… I have to say in that situation I have a tendency to take flight. There are no doubt a number of physiological and psychological factors contributing to my behaviour, underpinned by the all important desire for self preservation. However, there are a number of situations where I realise that the intense fear I am feeling in the form of my increasing breathing and heart rates, is not a primitive survival instinct scenario! And there are some situations where I recognise that I have overcome significant fears. Due to involvement in an unfortunate childhood incident in a reptile house during a school zoo trip, I had for many years suffered from an irrational fear of snakes. Although based in survival instinct, my fear became irrational to the point that I could not even face a picture of a snake – let alone the living, breathing, tongue flicking type! This changed, interestingly enough, during a school trip to a zoo as a parent accompanying my son. In the scheduled ‘meet the creatures’ interlude I found myself in the middle of a crowd, encircled in by a sea of people all less than four feet tall. I was acutely aware of my rising level of fear impacting on those little faces craning up at me and in particular the widening eyes of my son as the smiley guy holding the 6 foot long boa constrictor approached. I suddenly realised that this was not a life threatening situation and that I really had nothing to fear from this creature – it could do me absolutely no harm in this situation. So, I stopped looking for an escape route and reached out to touch the snake’s back. To my delight, so did my nervous son, his initial shocked expression turning into a triumphant smile. He looked rather proud later on when, for the school photo, I volunteered to hold the snake’s head. I suppose what I was feeling at that time was a sense of respect for the creature and it’s slow, calm state. Now, although I do not actively seek out snakes to meet and greet, I have quelled the rising fear on unexpected encounters by remembering the non- threatening scenario in the zoo that one time and recalling the surprisingly warm, smooth and muscular feeling of the creature as opposed to the less flattering stereotype of a cold, scaly and slippery experience. Have you overcome your fears? I would be very interested to know how! helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=84 Helen Noble Sun, 4 Feb 2007 00:00:00 GMT How do you see your choices in life? Are they limited by the nature of a situation or the actions or needs of others? Maybe you are able to negotiate or even create your own choices. Here’s the nub…in any situation, you always have a choice. Even a decision to do nothing is in fact the exercising of a choice. And what’s more, the awareness of choices can only serve to empower us. When faced with a difficult situation we can choose how to view the scenario and thus how to respond emotionally to it, or feel about it. How we view things though our automatic filter will inevitably determine the way we feel and how we eventually –or instantly – act in a given situation. For example if we feel that we have been treated unfairly or unjustly we are highly likely to feel something which we could log along the continuum of anger, rated from ‘mild irritation’ to ‘extreme rage’. What determines our response is how we think about the situation. (More about anger in a later blog entry) However, the point here is that we can choose what to think or how to view a situation, by ‘reframing’ it or altering our perspective in relation to it. We know that our perspective changes as time passes and we accrue more experiences – just ask any parent of a teenager and I’m sure they will be able to recall at least one time when they were faced with a conflict or comparison of ‘what they knew then’, in relation to their own teenage behaviour; and ‘what they know now’, perhaps some 30 years later! When a difficult situation leaves you feeling like you have no responsibility for it arising and so powerless to change it, it’s useful to use the tool I’ll call ‘spyglass’. Picture yourself holding a large magnifying glass and casting it over the scenes you have played in the run up to the ‘big scene’ (argument, etc) as if captured on a still reel of film. Look really closely at how you behaved; what you said; how you said it; maybe what you didn’t say but your body language conveyed – for example your facial expressions and gestures. Then reassess the part you actually played in the creation of the situation! Next, stand or sit yourself (whatever is most appropriate) in the position as occupied by the other party at the time of the argument. Ask yourself how it might have looked from there and openly consider how they may have felt at that time. The key here is to drop out of your contemplation all your preconceptions and judgements and be as open and neutral as you can. We will undoubtedly ‘find’ ourselves in situations where we initially think we have limited or no choices; however we can always choose our response to the situation. helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=85 Helen Noble Sun, 28 Jan 2007 00:00:00 GMT Nat said: ‘No - that’s a naff title. No-one will like it, in fact no-one will even read it. You really are crap at this, you should leave it to the experts – other people know much more than you.’ Then Pat stepped in and said: ‘I think it’s a good title, why not just go with it for now? Why won’t they like it? What’s there not to like? And how do you know they won’t read it? Has anyone actually said that to you?’ ‘I think you are good at this, just carrying on writing and see how it comes out …then decide what to do with it’ So, if I listen to Nat, which I have done on many occasions, I would probably get up from my seat to distract myself with a cup of tea or something, whilst wallowing in my self pity, and ruminating on how hard it is to actually get started on anything, let alone create anything of any help to anyone. If I listen to Pat, however, I find that my behaviour is different. Instead of being ‘shut down’ I am gently encouraged to stop debating the value of the title and to actually write something. Pat challenges my irrational thoughts, of ‘no –one will like and no-one will read’ by asking me for evidence to prove my fears are justified. Which of course I cannot answer, as I have no such evidence (yet!) Then she leaves me with the option to review it when I have actually produced something to read… So here I am, having written this much so far, and still all alone in a quiet room. The only noise around here is the quick click of the keys and the voices in my head. And no, I have never been diagnosed with any condition with which the hearing of voices is associated. What I am hearing is the old, Negative Automatic Thoughts that have taken route in my conscious mind and have so far in my life only ever served to hold me back – or rather to convince me to hold myself back…. closely followed by the newer, Positive Automatic Thoughts I have consciously developed to help me over come my old behaviour of tripping myself up at the starting line. PAT gives me options in place of instructions. There are no false promises here – just the opening up to possibilities; and a little more time and space (within my thought process) to make more valid decisions. What are your thoughts on this? helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=86 Helen Noble Sun, 21 Jan 2007 00:00:00 GMT Are you an activist? Do you often find yourself up and at it before you’ve actually checked something out? Or do you have to appreciate the practical benefits of a proposal to see the point? Maybe you need to gauge the ‘fit’ of a new concept within your overall framework of contemplation before you are able to accept or refute it. Perhaps you choose to sit back and reflect, only to watch a new opportunity pass you by before being heartily harnessed by your closest neighbour… The chances are that you will recognise one or more of these traits within your self, and with careful observation, in others too. These behavioural tendencies have been aligned with distinctive styles of learning*. So, you recognise the fact that you often spend too much time mulling over the pros and cons of something, and invariably end up doing nothing about it. What else can you do? Why not try out one of the other styles? Once your awareness has been raised, careful observance may result in a carefully calculated decision to intervene and so bring about a change. For example, If you consistently enter into situations which inevitably require a greater level of responsibility from you, than you first imagined, it might be useful to slow down your decision making process by adopting the pragmatic approach - consider as many of the practical consequences of your decision as you can muster and then ask someone else for their input on the subject too. The process of learning in itself is a form of knowledge or an experience. We can learn how to learn. Just think how very different are the experiences of say learning how to drive a car and learning a different language. You will need to use or develop different abilities to succeed in each. The benefits of investing in the learning process are akin to looking through the same scene through a wide angled lens. The landscape may throw up a previously unnoticed feature and zooming in you might discover a previously unnoticed obstacle or path way – at a second glance the whole horizon might appear very differently to you. As with other elements of human behaviour, the default settings of learning styles may be altered, enhanced maybe even overhauled, depending on what we choose to do with them. *Honey and Mumford 1982 helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=87 Helen Noble Sun, 14 Jan 2007 00:00:00 GMT Think of it like this - change is essentially dynamic - it’s about’ moving things’ and therefore requires the input of your effort to bring about the shift. So how much effort is needed? Is it the same amount of effort required for everyone to change? And why is it that some people seem to find it easier to change than others? Research* has suggested that we all progress through the same stages when changing something about ourselves, albeit at different paces. The contemplation stage is when we are seriously thinking about something but have not yet made a commitment to take action on it. We are weighing up the pros and cons, knowing where we want to go but not quite ready yet to take that turning. We are thinking, but not yet doing anything to bring about a change. The preparation stage is when we have made a conscious choice to do something differently and have managed to take a step or two in that direction, for example like cutting down on weekly alcohol or chocolate intake - but have not completely abstained from the habit. Action to effect the change requires a greater commitment of time and energy, for example attending the gym at three set times during the week for a period of eight weeks. The more action that is initiated at this stage then the greater the chances of overall success and the greater increase in the development of self belief in the ability to successfully make changes. Of course there are situations where one action can in itself be seen to effect a change – think in terms of leaving home, ending a relationship; or embarking on a journey… The maintenance stage is where we are working to prevent relapse by consolidating our gains. This is still a dynamic process – no resting on the laurels or taking a bit of ‘time out’! Nothing ever stops, change is a constant force! Some believe this stage actually lasts a lifetime, as illustrated by stabilising behaviour and the successful avoidance of relapse – or reverting to our previous habits. Others see it as a constant building process, using the foundations already laid down to make further progress. Each stage represents a period of time as well as a set of tasks needed for the movement to the next stage. It is possible to move from one stage to any other stage at any time; and the actual time spent in any one stage may vary However, the research* has clearly shown that people progressing at the rate of one stage in a month appear to double the chances of successfully making more changes in the future. A successful strategy to combat relapse has been identified* which involves components of both ‘thinking’ and ‘doing’. Successful ‘maintainers’ are able to identify and assess the conditions under which a relapse (return to the old habit) is likely for them – perhaps meeting up with a particular person under specific circumstances, such as a heavy and committed ‘smoker’ friend in a cosy bar or pub. Then they appear able to develop and enact one or more alternative responses, for example arranging and meeting the friend somewhere new and not closely associated with the habit of smoking. Success at such interventions has helped to reinforce the new thinking and behaviour of the successful maintainers and they began to experience living as the person they wanted to become. A relapse usually results in us reverting to one of the stages, which are seen in the form of a cycle .Also it is widely believed that each time someone relapses and recycle, they learn from their mistakes and that helps them to progress further in their next attempt. So now think about the number of new year resolutions you have made…and forgotten; perhaps diets you have read about …maybe even tried and abandoned ; and maybe the number of times someone close to you has told you that you need to give up smoking… Chances are you were at the pre- contemplation stage of change when those incidences occurred and yet to enter the cycle of the stages outlined above This stage is characterised by more resistance to change. We may have no intention to change in the foreseeable future. Why should we? Where’s the problem…we can’t see any problem? Although others around us might be able to see it!! We might even wish things could or would be different but we have no real intention to effect a change, - things aren’t really that bad…are they? How do you know if you’re at the pre- contemplation or contemplation stage? Ask yourself: Are you being as open as you can about your desire to change something? Do you spend time mulling things over in your mind? Do you sometimes respond in an emotional way to the perceived need for change? If the answer to these questions is no, then your are probably at the pre –contemplation stage However if you are still reading this, then it could just be that you are now entering the contemplation stage… *Prochaska, DiClemente and Norcross, 1992 Any e- mailed questions or comments will be welcomingly received and responded to helen@formulaforchange.co.uk http://www.formulaforchange.co.uk/blog.php?active_page=88 Helen Noble Sun, 7 Jan 2007 00:00:00 GMT